The Way-Station

A Big Texas Welcome Home

2012-03-01T12:45:00.000+04:30

For the first time I decided to take R&R leave athome. Normally I take advantage of theopportunity to take a trip to Europe for the two-week deployment break but thistime I just wanted to chill with the family.

Because I chose to go back to the States for break, it meantthat I would fly with 200 or so of my fellow service members back to Atlantafor a short break and then on to Dallas, where we would go our separate ways tomake connecting flights to our bases or hometowns around the country. I’d heard stories from other Soldiers who’dpassed through Dallas on these kinds of flights and most talked about whatgreat people these Texans were and how they really came out for thetroops. I had no idea what we were instore for and even watching clips from some of the local news coverage doesn't do their efforts justice.

Our plane landed on the DFW tarmac at about midday. By then we’d been flying for about 18 hoursor so since leaving Kuwait. As westarted to taxi in, the pilot mentioned that we should look out our windowsbecause the fire department had something for us. Well, they did. Normally reserved for retiring pilots, thefire team at DFW brought out two trucks to pay a salute to us by hosing downthe plane. I can only imagine what itlooked like from the outside, those high arcing streams of water. It literally gave me chills of pride.

After we made it to the gate and got our briefing about howthings would go through customs, we began deplaning. Right outside our gate were dozens of peopleof all ages and creeds cheering us. Itwas overwhelming and strangely uncomfortable, particularly when many of theseare Vietnam veterans and spouses – people who didn’t get any sort ofrecognition for their sacrifices, yet there they were. We tried to shake every hand without slowingthe line too much.

After customs and some smiles from TSA workers we moved intothe main terminal where people in green jackets started rounding us up to passon flight information and give directions on where to go. A few even took some of our Soldiers to theirgates personally. Their effort reallyhelped this sleep-deprived, groggy-headed troop get where I needed to go.

Unfortunately I was looking at a fairly lengthy layover dueto a cancellation but while I was standing there an employee from AmericanAirline escorted me to their Admiral club for coffee and snacks. They had apparently rounded up a few of usand pointed out where the showers were and told us we could stay as long as weliked. Most of the people there were onbusiness of some sort or were members, but nearly all smiled and nodded andmore than one came up to say thank you for serving. I generally like to be anonymous but that’shard to do in uniform so the nods were much appreciated.

Then my crew of a few and I boarded our flight for SEATACfor the homecoming we’d all been anxiously waiting for since the journeystarted. The flight there was smooth andthe pilot said some nice things about us and people clapped but all I couldthink about was Rinni and the boys.

The two weeks were great and leave gave me a chance to restand devote time to appreciate my family. The trip back to SEATAC was hard but I was resolved to put my game faceback on once I got inside. Security movedme up to the front of the line and I was at my gate in no time. A very nice gesture by the airport and TSAbut not so appreciated by some of the folks in line.

At any rate I boarded with three other Soldiers and off wewent. Once we hit our cruising altitudeone of the flight attendants asked me what I wanted for breakfast but as Iordered and started pulling out my wallet she told me an anonymous gentlemenbought breakfast for all of the military folks on the flight. I asked her if I couldn’t at least thank himand she said she’d pass it on for me. Being the keen observer I spied her passing on my message later on but Irespected his wish to be anonymous.

Funny thing I noticed though after we landed in Dallas. I got my bags and was heading out to catch ashuttle for my next leg and saw the anonymous guy walk out to hug his wife andget in their car to leave. Yup, Texasplates.

I’ve been all over the planet these last 20 years and I haveto say that those individual and collective efforts to show thanks to ourservice members by your average Texan is something to cherish. It’s something akin to what we get fromfamily and friends we’ve always known, who understand the difficulties militarylife brings. Yet these are strangers,run of the mill folks just like the rest of us but man, they sure do take pridein their military.

Yes, they do it bigger in Texas; whether it’s the TSAworkers, the green-jacket gang, the AA employee, the transient passenger, theveterans, or the anonymous fliers. Thankyou all for making that a homecoming to remember and cherish, and God blessTexas for all the small blessings you’ve given us.

The Shores of Beaumaris

2012-02-10T07:12:00.001+04:30

This is a story about unfinished business. Business, it sounds so corporate, so officialand cold. There is no message for youhere, no wisdom or advice. This is an attempt to share what waslocked away in the subconscious. This story is a purely selfish endeavor, an attempt to understand apain that could never heal.

The Shores of Beaumaris, A Welsh Soldier's Tale

I left the best friend I ever had there on life’s road, withoutexplanation or reason, with no closure. Though I doubt my friend dwells on it at all, the initial wounds Ilikely caused by that sudden disappearance has eaten its way to the fore of mymind.

I once imagined myself an old man, retired, gazing out at theIrish Sea from the shores of Beaumaris with you. Our wrinkled, weathered hands intertwined aswe breathed in the salty air and listened to the waves as they crashed on therocky shore. Not a word was spoken, likemany of our conversations words simply did not convey the essence let alone the depth of what was passed between us.

You were a former business tycoon, having saddled and broken theairline industry into a lucrative and efficient enterprise. I was writing about the things in life thatmattered and moved people, stories that revolved around emotion and feelings,the intangibles some might say. The hardwork was behind us.

Too old to scale the castle ruins any longer, we would stillbask in their presence, imagining ourselves in that time and place when theywere new; when Longshanks waged his war on the Welsh. I would picture us in that time before thefortresses when peace and sovereignty were the mark of the Welsh people, before thecampaigns that ultimately consumed the entire British Isles.

Then I am back to the present, to that stone cottage along thesea with the hearth ablaze, pushing the damp chill outside with ferocity. I stoke it to encourage its battle while youfinish preparing my tea with milk; a drink that used to offend my Americansensibilities with the mere thought, but has been a beginning to our day and ourevening respite for all these many years.

I can feel the breeze as we walk slowly to the pub in town. It’s a little smoky but it’s a working classplace for those of us who have seen the harder days of our labors pass. There are no strangers here as we laugh andrevel in the easy banter with our neighbors. Music and stories fill these evenings with friends, reflecting on theglories of our past with the older patrons and sharing the wisdom from thejourney with the younger.

But it’s always those moments when we steal away to a cozycorner and talk, just the two of us, about life’s revelations and the things that still invigorate our passions. It’s the easybanter too; it’s the laughter and picking that warm my soul so. And so it goes through this one particularevening, one not so different from the multitudes we’ve shared.

That was my dream, my hope and maybe the reason I left so longago. I took a different path down a roadthat bent another way. I’m empty withoutthat banter, your playful jabs. Youunderstood me better than anyone and knew the right measure of all that Ineeded. Mostly it was your healing compassion that Iremember best. You cured my wounded souland let me tend to yours.

Then I left and opened a fresh wound no doubt, and with noexplanation. It must have been ahorrible puzzle left to wonder. In your typical fashion you wanted to lend your nurturing aid fearing some grievous injury hadbefallen me.

There was grievous injury but the worst of the physical damagewas not mine, and that was what harmed me most in the end. I could not be released from my suffering asdeath released the suffering of my comrade, my friend. My choice was no choice because I livedbeyond that infamous day; I received no coup de gras.

For the longest time it was a festering sore that I had nocourage to describe to you so that you might give aid. I didn’t understand and couldn’t explain whya deep part of me welcomed the suffering and pain it brought, the guilt ofhaving lived beyond that most horrid day.

So I was silent and prayed that God would grant my coup and asthe days wore on and my evident silence troubled you, my pain and fearmounted.

I slipped away to a place inside myself. I hid from the world and kept safe the lastvestiges of the humanity and hope that were once mine. It was a cocoon to help weather the storm,sheltered from the rot of my injuries, to bide me time so that I could heal.

Healing came, though gradual, and as I began to find that partof me so long lost I found emptiness I could not recall. But I can never go back. I am numb, and without humor as if I wokefrom a coma that consumed so much more than mere time.

The wound has healed and my mind is awake now. It is a silent place inside where I dwellthese days and recount the dreams we shared; tears well in my eyes as Ithink of you, my greatest hope and best friend, now lost.

I still visit the Isle of Anglesey and look out on the Irish Seafrom the shores of Beaumaris, where we stood and dreamed together so manyyears ago.

Sleepwalking

2012-01-18T14:32:00.001+04:30

Noxious diesel exhaust makes my stomach roil and I ammiserable in this sweat baked days-old uniform. I’m filthy, but rarely are we able to look our best at that definingmoment.

The long flight through desert darkness has my head swimmingin exhaustion. The smells from this crampedbriefing room assault me with the odor of a hundred sets of festering feet. I want to throw up, get started, or justleave but there are maps and routes and frequencies to remember.

Every detail is critical for that “just in case” situation;a drill I haven’t exercised in years. Iam almost frantic inside to hold tight to each shred that might make adifference.

Then it clicks in my head and confidence returns; I’m anorchestrator of death these days, bringing it to the enemy with a subtlety thatslips in like a thief and undermines their cause. I take away those they love most along withthose they would subvert; I strip them bare and publicly shame each and everyone.

I push aside my daydream and reach for some clarity andfocus just as Dan punches me in the arm and calls me a REMF. We laugh the last vestiges of fear away andas it dissolves a singular purpose to protect and survive come to thefore.

We bicker over the turret but Dan claims the seat to watchover me – while I will focus every ounceof energy and concentration I can muster on our purpose. I am the bringer of death to the trueransackers of faith, and so we roll out.

We move quickly through the streets with precision andpurpose. Onlookers pay us no mind as weroll on toward death’s gate; a warren of evil, tormented souls.

We aim to find the proof of their crimes and use it to orchestratetheir demise; driving the wedge deeper between them and the masses with truth.

Two more turns to breach this city and as we clear the wallat the outer edge it strikes me curious that the people have vanished.

Blackness and silence.

Confusion rolls through me like a mad tide, reaching handsattached to steely white faces paw at and around me but I feel nothing. Their expressions grow ever more desperate asthey pull and twist and strain to free me. From what? What is happening?

What is wrong with you people? Stop touching me!

I exist in some kind of illusion. I try to speak but nothing comes out and allI hear is a constant wash of static all around me and an annoying squealemanating from the center of my head.

I take a deep breath to clear my head but as the air fillsmy lungs dread begins to cover me like a shroud. That smell, it triggers a gag while my mindprocesses a buffet of odors so foul; charred and rancid meat, rotten eggs andspent fuel. I gag again from the bilecreeping up to my throat and note the smell of feces, shit everywhere.

The feeling starts to come back and I realize I’m wet,soaked all over my face and body. I bendmy fingers and wrists and reach to investigate while outside hands continue topry at me. It’s wet and sticky so I movemy head slightly and look down. I’m coveredin red and brown tissue, a mass of blood and foulness. It’s everywhere, on me and all around where Ilay.

A short jolt and I am sliding backwards, past a smokingwreck with its twisted black empty turret.

Blackness and silence.

He’ll make it they keep saying. I feel only searing pain between and behindmy eyes as I try to open them just a crack, breaking the lids free of the crust,to see a man’s face grimly nod.

“You’re okay,” I think he tells me.

I try to get my bearings and catch flashes and Dannymounting up so I ask for him but it’s like talking through an ocean so I tryharder and force out the words.

“Sit tight,“ he shouts, “You’re going to be good to go, justsit tight.”

The air begins to swirl, summoning dust and hot air. It grows stronger like some hellish tempestas shadows threaten to fall on me again, leaving me to frantically beg for myfriend. I try to steel myself, to stay longenough for an answer that doesn’t come.

Sweet silence and blackness begin to win over. I give in to the darkness and embrace therelease from this waking dream. Iprocess the occasional flash of a quick glance into my eyes and a confident butgrim expression.

I can’t tell you what happened in those days and weeks thatfollowed. I lived in a world all a blur,like a Russian film I had no interest in watching. I know that I saw the friendly, sad and sternfaces of people I didn’t know, didn’t care to know, who tried vainly to coax mefrom my retreat of dark silence.

I found familiar people in my mental refuge, family andfriends, the people I loved and the one I loved most. I recounted the days of my life and basked inthat heaven of the past. I started toglimpse old dreams and plans and felt a stirring in my chest.

It was almost time to wake up so my mind methodically wrappeditself in armor for what lay waiting outside. If I must come out the sole survivor then I would with hopes andemotions locked away with the fear and pain. I came out, time to get on with the charade.

People hear what they want to hear so if you know the answeryou win the prize. All I wanted was timeand space to myself so I rattled off the answers.

Yes, I missed my friend. No, I couldn’t remember what happened. No, I don’t blame myself and of course it was hard but I had my duty tothink about, too. Yes, I would see hisfamily when my time here was done. Yes,I feel like I can get back to work in some capacity. Of course I’ll take it easy.

My body was healed but my mind required a distraction from thisdeath I felt I so desperately deserve. Iwould find a full load of work to keep the demons away, to keep the focus sharpenedon other things.

It was only through coercion that I finally spoke to myparents, to assure them that I was fine despite the hysteria a uniformed man causedwhen they first learned of the incident. I knew there were likely others wondering about me but I couldn’t bearthe pain of answering the questions all over again, so I shut them out and sealedthat life away behind an impenetrable wall of brick.

I went back to work, eager for a fast pace though mycolleagues seemed reluctant to indulge me at first. Maybe they saw a shadow of resentment in myeyes for having survived when others did not. I would have gladly traded fates to end my guilt but it was not tobe. I think they knew that and for itthey feared for me.

So I took on more and even began to grin a little, pokingfun so they would stop worrying. Peopleheard what they wanted to hear and saw what they wanted to see so they put meback in front of the orchestra and I conducted the greatest symphony ofdestruction ever wrought on my adversary. Our victory was headlined for weeks around the world. I had my vengeance, was hungry for more andwould find it.

The day came when I had to go home. I was filled with anxiousness, remembering atlast that there were people I would have to see, to talk to and explain thingsto. With the dread came the need toreinforce my shell, to create the conditions for distance with those who didnot know and could not understand what this was all about.

I barely remember talking to Dan’s family. I don’t know what I said but what came out musthave made them very. Mostly I recitedthe reports I read because there was so little that I could actuallyremember. They were grateful for what Icould give and I was grateful to see some of their sadness lifted. I felt some of my own lift through thatexperience.

I stepped out of the terminal, took a deep breath of warmclean air, and made my way to the parking garage and on for home. Gradually I started to build a new life andfilled in the empty spaces with the hobbies I missed and even new people. I locked my anger away and decided to find away to earn the life I’d been given a second time.

I worked harder and lived even harder, placing newexperiences in the remaining gaps I felt inside. But these were gaps that couldn’t be filledand I was clueless to the reason for the emptiness I felt.

I dreamed of the sea, of being adrift far beyond the breaksin the roiling churn and waves. Sometimes a hand would reach for me, out from the mist, but I sat thereunmoving, afraid to reach out and take it.

In the waking world some part of me knew what it meant butshrank from it, patching the brickwork and resealing the cracks in my wall. I couldn’t bear to revisit my old life, theold friends and those I loved. That lifeleft a part of me numb but it was a part sealed away so I endured and continueto pretend I was this person remade.

The best advice I may have ever gotten was advice I gave tosomeone else. I finally talked withsomeone who could help, a disinterested party with experience in these matters. Over the course of the next months I began toremember and compartmentalize the fragments and feelings from that horrid day ayear earlier. I started to dissolve theillusionary life and feel something real inside but I also began to understandthe source of the gaps and empty spaces.

What bitter irony that my days have become less troubled,but the darkness now haunts me. It’sthose nights when I am alone in the churning sea that I am most afraid now becauseI know the hand that reached for me is gone now, has been gone for sometime.

What bitter irony that I should be at a place where I havebegun to crave life again yet the sweetest part that was my life faded away whileI was lost in the blackness. So Iembrace the days and do what I can to endure the nights when I am left driftingon that moonlit sea. I breathe in the freshsalt air and pray that this will be the night when your hand reaches out for meone last time.

A few moments for clarity

2012-01-02T19:26:00.000+04:30

One of themost important things I think a person can do in a difficult situation is workto pass by the bad in order to find that silver lining. Deployments are like that in so many aspects.

On one handthere is the 140 hours a week you put into the job. It takes so much out of you mentally andphysically that those rare moments you have to yourself you either try just ashard to make the most of that time by writing or decompressing with sometrivial hobby or pass out from exhaustion.

Theprofessional Tom lives for moments like these, grinding away until theopportunity presents itself to strike a blow on an adversary. I live for the counterattack and of coursethe methodical planning and preparation that goes into coaxing an opponent inbefore dealing the lethal blow. It wasAl Qaeda in Iraq the last time, today it’s the Taliban…again.

Oh, but thisblog isn’t about war, or at least not about the day to day business of doingthe job. It is about being a Soldier ina manner of speaking because for me that has been a significant part of my lifeeven after the duty day is done. Isuppose being here, being deployed just magnifies it all the more because thereare no alternatives and the quiet time I do have here allows only enough roomto think and reflect.

Is the jobdifficult? Not really so much difficultas challenging. What’s difficult are thedays leading up to coming to a place like this; the hours with friends andfamily lost in order to train and prepare, the packing and sorting, and thegoodbyes. The goodbyes are the hardest.

Being aSoldier, for me, has meant many lonely days and nights. It’s meant drifting apart from the friendsand family whose lives are rooted into the fabric of a community with routinesand PTAs and all of the other “Americana” norms people enjoy, even relyon. Sometimes over time I’ve been ableto reunite with a lost friend or former colleague and those are almost alwaysgood days but it’s rare and something to cherish.

Being aSoldier has meant that I have to travel lighter than most, constantly sheddingthe material things that most people collect over the years and keeping mythings in boxes in anticipation of the next move. Those things you can always find replacementsfor in time…mostly. I keep probably farmore these days than I used to but nonetheless deploying means a purge of thenon-essentials.

I wonderfrom time to time what’s wrong with me that I can continue to live from boxes andpass on the chance to place roots in a community. This deployment has been particularlydifficult because in just a mere month I feel like I’ve lost contact with manypeople I felt were friends. I’ve gottena couple of cards, a few packages and a sprinkle of e-mail but each time Ideploy there are dozens of people left over I’ll probably not hear from again.

I wonderwhat’s wrong with me that I’m not depressed about the whole thing. In fact, I actually feel pretty good when youreally get down to it and I suppose some of my older blogs are really the keyas to why.

Thisdifficult situation, like so many we face, has given me an insight regardingthose I considered friends. On one handthere is the collection of friends borne and maintained out of convenience whohave seemed to disappear because a deployment is not convenient to afriendship. Truthfully, I’m glad to haveparted ways because it allows me to focus much more on the other group. That small group who take a minute out of thegrind to drop a line or something in the mail to say “hey, you’re not forgottenover there.” I’ll take one of thosepeople over a hundred of the other.

It’s kind offunny that as I get older I start to find myself more and more wishing to finda place to put down roots and shed this uniform once and for all. The only thing that concerns me is that forthe last 19 and a half years and the growing responsibilities that come withthe job has provided these opportunities to clearly see the truth of whatmatters; the needs versus the wants.

So if I parkthe caravan in one place someday how will I ever see the truth of people andthings around me? No telling I suppose,but for now I’ll just relax for a moment and enjoy some time for peacefulreflection on the people I have in my life. I am grateful for the opportunity to see them so clearly.

Tom's Top 10 for 2011

2011-12-27T18:56:00.001+04:30

Most of you generallytake a little time to reflect on the previous year, that’s part of the dealwhen you’re counting down the days and hours before the New Year partiesbegin. The lists run the gambitfrom greatest this or most incredible that, I’m doing it my way with a top-10all my own.

Here we are in noparticular order - The 2011 Top-10 odd things I love about my wife:

10. Bursts into random song: It doesn’t take much because she’s a genuinely happy person butwhen the mood strikes her she will turn a sentence into lyrics. It’s an interesting way to communicate thatalways makes me smile because even if I don’t know the words or the beat I knowshe’s happy and that is always a good feeling.

9. Love of HGTV: Everything from interior design tothe DIY projects, she’s game for a round of HGTV any time of day. Best part is the inspiration she gets from it,which generally means I’m free to do whatever sort of projects I want – withhelp from my best friend in the world – Rinni.

8. Messes up the office: We share the office with space reserved for her crafting and somefor my technical geekery. There are afternoonswhen I walk in, after she’s been MIA for a while, and discover a couple ofthings – fabric and materials strew all over the place and my crafty wifecreating some new creature for her ETSY store. She’ll look up and grin apologetically and Iremind her of our agreement, all spaces are her spaces. She’ll giggle and I’ll carve out enough room todo a little work.

7. Handing over the reins: My wife takes the lead on day to day matters at home, mostlybecause she’s good at it and I work ridiculous hours. We’re both involved but she’s the force behindthe rhythm in our home. We do most thingstogether from packing lunches, helping the boys with homework, cleaning,gardening, etc. What’s great though isthat when she’s not at 100% because of a headache or a cold she’ll let me makeher tea, put her to bed and run the whole operation. It’s those rare tastes of power she indulges …orrather, responsibility that makes me appreciate what she does every day.

6. The rants: Rinni is a kind-heartedperson with those she loves and generally gives people the benefit of thedoubt. She’s also equal partssmart and knows BS when she sees it. It’s those rare occasions when someone or something got her backup that she’ll unload, just the two of us. I mostly nod and try not to smile while she flaysthe living skin from the subject. Afterward she feels better and so do I. It’s good to let go and I’m grateful she trustsme be her sounding board.

5. Bargain hunter: She takes guilty pleasure in finding the most(quality) and spending the least. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve come home when she’s justreturned from a bargain shopping spree to see downcast eyes and a pile of loot,mostly clothes for our ever-growing boys. She’ll always start out replaying the events inher pouty voice, gradually gaining volume as she looks up with a crescendofinish of how little she spent. By this time I’m laughing and shaking my head while she glows withpride. It’s pretty hysterical.

4. Dramatic reading: While we both try to instill reading for pleasure in the boys, mywife never misses an opportunity to lead by example through her love ofreading. Whether it’s ‘How totame your dragon’ or the latest ‘Percy Jackson’, Rinni knows and does all thevoices as she goes through the pages. A lover of words she brings every story alive for us.

3. Dirty jobs: Some of the momentsshe’s most beautiful to me are those when she’s up to her elbows in topsoil orcompletely covered with saw dust. It’s completely normal to walk out the front door on a Saturday orSunday afternoon to see her pulling weeds, planting something, diggingsomething or starting a new restoration job on a piece of furniture she foundon Craig’s list. These are always familyaffairs with the reward coming at the end of the day when we can sit on theswing under the Magnolia and admire the results.

2. Unabashed silliness: There are more examples than I could ever recount in this one postbut suffice it to say that we laugh a lot in our home and Rinni is theringleader. The boys are constantlytortured with her tickles and kisses, silly faces and hysterical voices – theycan’t stop laughing once she’s on a roll and neither can I.

1. No assembly required: The very best oddity that I love about my wife is that she’sprobably the most flexible, laid-back people on the planet. It’s huge because I’m a firm believer thatvariety and spontaneity are the spice of life. Where others require a detailed plan for adrive in the country, she appreciates the surprise. Typical example on the way out of a storeparking lot:

Me: in a hurry to get home?

Her: Not really, why?

Me: Let’s take a drive

Her: Okay

Then we’re off through the winding back-roads inwhatever state we happen to be living at the time. It’s the kind of thing many would get upsetabout but not Rinni – she just smiles and enjoys the ride.

Just ten examples of themillion reasons I love my Richelle Nicole. Odd to some, divine to me!

My very short wishlist

2011-12-24T22:04:00.000+04:30

My Christmas Wish

There isn’t anything I need. When I look at all that I have, beginning and ending with a family wholoves me, I can only be thankful for the miracle they are to me. While I miss them terribly and wish I couldbe home to see their smiles Christmas morning, I am confident the love and support we share will carry us all through.

There are some things I would ask for though, just a few this year:

I really want my wife and boys to have an enjoyable Christmaswith family. Take away their anxiety andworry and give them the confidence that all will be well, if just for today. Give them lots of reasons to smile and laughand make sure Rinni gets the inspiration to burst out in random song.

I really want all of the families back home who have lovedones deployed to know a bit of comfort today. I want our military men andwomen, who are away from home for the first time during the holidays, to have a smile and anopportunity to talk to their loved ones.

I really want opportunities for all of the wonderful authorsI’ve met these last months. Give them anudge of confidence when they’re tired or start to despair. Help readers discover the magic of their stories. Help Jeff continue to climb the charts, help Steve Market his amazing trilogy and help Shelli continue to touch hearts and souls with her incredible stories.

I really want patience and peace for everyone. We’ve been at this war for a long time and it’sreally time to finish and send our people home. Show our citizens the optimism and give them the resolve to overcomethese difficult days at home, remind them what they are capable of with selflessresolve. They’ve faced bigger challengesand met them head on – they can do it again.

It’s a list that gets shorter as I grow older but it seemslike the tasks are more difficult. Well,this is a time of miracles they say. While there is nothing I need for myself, there are certainly a fewthings I wish for this Christmas.

Priceless gifts

2011-12-22T08:59:00.000+04:30

Technology is a wonderful thing and even though it can deliver something as cool as the pictures you see here, it pales in comparison to our children. What can I say, I have a soft spot for kids so when I get something as cool as the drawing you see here, I have to post it and share it with everyone.

I lost track of the cumulative months I've spent away from my family over the years but it's gestures like these that can give you a smile during the longest days when you're really missing home.

So a big thanks to our sever year-old patriot from South Carolina who asked his mom if she could send this to a Soldier because he didn't know any. And yes, Soldiers like candy-canes but not too many because they could spoil your dinner.

Be Silent

2011-12-17T21:09:00.002+04:30

I’m restless, irritable and feeling a little like beingisolated for a while. There’s so muchnoise in my head at the moment, barely any room for thought when I’m out in theworld.

Locked inside my silent sanctuary, I’m insulated from thesenseless murmuring of things people cannot control yet bring onthemselves.

The whining fromself-proclaimed victims is irrational and self-serving. I am unnerved by the self-absorbed nature ofso many; the tactless commentary of ‘woe is me’ in the faces of those of us whohave endured quietly.

The wasted energyis pointless, arrogant, selfish, but mostly laughable were I not so fed up withthem.

Always measuring, assessing, comparing and ultimatelycomplaining when the statistics do not favor them over others. It’s their drama and bitching that has meagitated and itching. Silence theirbuzzing in my ears, rid me of their noisy complaining or teach them the truemeaning of traveling the hard road.

Open their eyes so they can understand what it is to endure,adapt, adjust and persevere…but quietly, humbly, with honor and integrity. Open their eyes to see beyond themselves sothey can know the load others carry without complaint; courageously,persistently moving forward with purpose in every step, and meaning in everyword.

If they cannot see or will not hear then silence theirjabbering in my ear, by any means. I havea load to carry, a road to travel and their incessant buzzing is making my headache.

I am spent on compassion for theself absorbed, the self defeating, and the ever complaining whining few whowould even gripe about a gnat’s hair out of place when all other options are expended.

Rid me of these tales of woe so that I can focus on the roadand direction I must go. Swat thesesilly flies, energy-sucking mosquitoes, leaches all; always ungrateful when I’mused up.

I am used up, aggravated,agitated because they lack a care or awareness to know what it is the rest mustdo and have done without constraint or complaint.

I’m restless, eager to be on my way and away from thenoise. To harm’s way? No, a quiet place inside that nurtures focusand stokes my resolve. It’s a place where others doggedly do their duty andshare past hardships. It’s a place thathas no time for those who only see their own suffering, foster the unfairnessdone to them, or waste their time bitching rather than rolling up their sleevesand carrying on with the hard work left to do.

I choose to live life no matter the circumstances. I choose to put forward the effort toincrease my chance to accomplish. Ichoose to move over, around, under or through the barriers in my path.

Move forward or move on, my reserves for the weak andunwilling are empty.

Be silent or be gone.

How To Live In A Drama Free Zone Using Duct Tape And A Tire Iron

2011-12-13T14:17:00.000+04:30

Originally I thought toincorporate bailing wire into the title and content of this little rant butafter thinking about it I realized there are far more applications for ducttape so that’s what we’ll work with today.

Please take the following comments with a grain of salt but if the shoefits then don’t be surprised when someone applies some of the tips contained hereinto your person. Having said that, I donot condone assault and battery, or any other related crime against anotherperson, regardless of their level of stupidity. In cases where another person’s stupidity begins to raise your bloodpressure to the point of causing a “fight” reaction, simply remember thatDarwinism will inevitably rectify the nuisance and you can maintain your goodkarma.

So, on with the topic for today:battling a drama queen with tools as simple as duct tape and a tire iron.

Recognize a drama queen

Whether it’s your favoritehangout, place of work, or even your home, there are those out there who willpollute the environment and even your personal space with drama. To most of us it is important to maintain adrama free zone. Before we go further let’sunderstand what we mean by drama.

Webster says:

a. A prose or verse composition, especially one telling aserious story, that is intended for representation by actors impersonating thecharacters and performing the dialogue and action.

b. A serious narrative work or program for television,radio, or the cinema.

c. A situation or succession of events in real lifehaving the dramatic progression or emotional effect characteristic of a play

That’s not what we’re talking about here though insome aspects it may be close, particularly with part c. In fact the definition we’re focusing ontoday is much simpler and offers far less return on investment. Hey, I like a good play as much as the nextguy.

The Online Slang Dictionary says:

· A constant sourceof interpersonal conflict.

The trouble with people who are the source of thisinterpersonal conflict is they see nothing wrong with their behavior and oftenfeel that they are the victim in any given scenario, which in itself lends toeven more dramatic effect. There aresimple character traits that go along with a “Drama Queen” but first, let’s beclear that the inference made by the usage of “Queen” in no way limits this tothe female gender because there are ample supplies of men out there who areeven more over the top with their drama. All that is really required of a Drama Queen is that they be any combinationof the following:

Ignorant or indifferent to the environmentand people around them

Disillusioned to the more significantchallenges a person or group may face in life

Manipulative

Tactless

Inappropriate or Offensive in socialsettings

Self indulgent

Corrupt or dishonest in their delivery

A gossip

By themselves these traits do not necessarily make adrama queen but they are the building blocks that can transform your averageturd into a big pain in your ass. Eventually they can affect you and those around you. Like a turd, their smell will eventually stickunless you take steps to mitigate their presence, though I suggest you removethem all together.

SomeExamples

We alluded to scenarios and environments where youmight find these parasites and the truth is they are everywhere and can afflictanyone. Here are a few examples tohighlight our template for identifying a drama queen and the places you mayfind them.

1. Bill really likes Jane and wants to go outwith her. After all, Jane is smoking hotand though Bill’s not the ugly duckling in this story he is new in town. Bill eventually asks Jane out and date one leads tomore dates. At first everything’s cooland Bill is feeling good about this blossoming romance. He eventually begins to meet Jane’s friendsand her family. He notes that of Jane’sfour children, each has a different father, which may or may not warrant acloser look. However, as Bill laternotes, each of these “fathers” is either in jail, spent significant time injail or has been the subject of a significant investigation at the federallevel. Bill also hears Jane’s stories ofwoe and perseverance, with Jane being the central figure and heroine. Bill notes that the children are on variouspaths to self destruction and further deduces that the parenting skills Janeemploys are something more akin to advice teens may give one another thansomething you’d expect from an adult. Bill further discovers that more family members are or have beenimplicated in crime and other less savory behavior. Jane eventually begins to tell Bill tales toincite jealousy and subtlety suggests Bill do something about it. She also begins to suggest Bill get involvedto right wrongs done to other family members and that given the nature of theperpetrators, less than legal means may be necessary. Bill decides to run.

(Bill should have run long before it got to that pointhowever a simple application of duct tape over Jane’s mouth when she startedtrying to implicate him into her drama would have ended the conversation. Bill could have then armed himself with thetire-iron in the event Jane sent one of the ex-cons after him)

2. Jessica is dating Dan on and off. The problem with Dan is he’s still verybitter about his three year-old divorce, specifically the divorcee who hascustody of their two kids. Danconstantly decries wrong-doing to Jessica about his ex-wife and how the ex’scomments are hurtful and meant to divide him from the children. He complains that during the 10 years theywere married she emasculated him with her emotional abuse. Later when Jessica is in the middle ofexplaining to Dan about a personal family tragedy (uncle died in an accident),Dan starts complaining about the ex and an argument they had the nightbefore. “Hello” - Jessica is about to gohome to bury her uncle. EventuallyJessica decides Dan is a bit self-absorbed and a little more than neuroticabout the ex so she creates some distance. A week later Dan realizes his error and attempts to make amends andoffers to take Jessica to dinner the following Monday. Jessica wants to know why Monday and Danexplains that he is going away for the weekend and after Jessica drills downinto the typical questions she discovers Dan’s going to link up for the weekendwith a former girlfriend. Jessicapolitely declines the dinner invitation.

(Jessica waited a little longer than wasnecessary. Though she thought Dan hadpotential, his being consumed with an ex and the one-sided portrayal ofvictimization should have sent a clear message. She could have duct-taped Dan’s hands to a piece of furniture and smackedhim in the testicles with the tire iron for being a selfish Nancy in her timeof need. She then could have struck afirm blow to Dan’s jaw for thinking dinner would be okay after his ridiculoustrip to the ex-girlfriend’s.)

3. Jeff walks into his new office to meet thestaff. Everyone seems friendly thoughhe’s already gotten warnings about Samantha from upper management regardingsome of her personal exploits with folks in the office. Samantha is married with one child however,she spends most evenings at a local bar with “friends” from accounting. The problem has gotten so out of control thatmost of the team feel Samantha is untouchable and rumor has it she actuallytrades “favors” with managers for choice assignments. Over the next few days Jeff makes it a pointto talk to each employee about his expectations as the new team lead for thedepartment. Finally Samantha’s turncomes and Jeff invites her in to take a seat on the other side of thedesk. As she sits Jeff notes her oglingat him, batting eyes, licking lips…the works. Jeff walks out of the office and makes a general announcement that he isthere to work not befriend or date his team members.

(Jeff should simply duct tape Samantha’s legstogether, her mouth shut and use the tire iron to threaten the janitor if hedoesn’t remove her with the rest of the rubbish.)

Let’s face it, these people are everywhere and whilesome encounters are less “dramatic” you see them every day. Think about the latest water-coolerdiscussion concerning a beef stemming from a coworker who took a professionaldisagreement as a personal affront and is actively engaged in characterassassination on the other party or even worse, made more significant, untrueaccusations against the person. Most ofyou probably also know the guy who’s dating a girl who seems bent on crushinghis soul because every time things seem to be going well she’s breaking up withhim because of a bad day that led to her suddenly being confused about theirrelationship. Funny thing is just whenhe starts coming to grips with being a bachelor she’s knocking on the dooragain with a backhanded apology because it couldn’t possibly be her issue; “I’msorry I’m such a jerk but it’s your fault”

BestPractices in Removal

Probably the simplest method of removal and leastcostly to you is to simply ignore them. Yes, let them walk right on by from the very first moment you see themand pay them no mind whatsoever, ever. It is because of their very nature they will gravitate to a listeningaudience, particularly one that engages their nonsensical discussion andbehavior. Keep in mind those “red flags”your conscience constantly waves in front of your face and heed them.

It’s not always easy or possible because when you’retalking about work you can’t simply quit if the drama queen is persistent. Sometimes even when you ignore them they takeoffense and you’re suddenly wearing a target on your back. In these cases you must stand your ground andact immediately and decisively, it’s time to get out your duct tape and tireiron.

For the gossiper, hate spreader, rumor currier I wouldsuggest duct taping the mouth, really. Imagine the reaction from the folks in the office when Harriet HateMonger starts yapping away at the water cooler to you about how Mike is lootingthe coffers, has a mistress, shot a priest, etc. and you react by pulling outyour duct tape and wrapping it around her mouth a few times…and a few more forgood measure. Sure, you may face somecharges but there will be no doubt in anyone’s mind that you don’t appreciategossip. Not only will Harriet neverspeak to you again (unless she’s testifying), none of the other drama queens inthe office will dare approach you. IfHarriet is a Harry, simply replace the duct tape with the tire iron and breakhis lower jaw in several places. You’llhave a few months reprieve while you sort out your legal affairs and Harry’sjaw is wired shut. Just think about thepeace and quiet the office will have while he’s convalescing and you’re finishingup your sentence. Sometimes you have totake one for the team.

When your friend continues to get beat down by thelove of his life and keeps going back for more, take out the tire iron andsmash his testicles but ensure you get in at least two to three blows so he reallygets the message. Whatever the doctorscan salvage should be placed in a box. Once that’s done, duct tape the box closed and send the mutilatedtesticles to his lover. That’s reallyall she wanted to begin with and since he wasn’t using them everything should beback to a normal balance. Sure, yourfriend will be more than a little pissed but think about the message you’resending to men everywhere, ‘grow a pair or get them smashed…or simply stay thehell away from me with your relationship drama.’

The Bottom Line

While we strive to be good people it’s always a goodidea to face the mirror and check yourself out, assess the things that troubleyou and put them in proper perspective. Think about how you engage the people around you; are you truthful? Are you trying to get an advantage oversomeone through dishonest means? Are youtalking about people’s personal business? Are you engaged in a relationship that offers more bad days thangood? Do you or your partner walk awayfrom an encounter feeling diminished by the other?

Most of us just want to live our lives dramafree. We want to enjoy quality time withour families, significant others, friends and co-workers. The world is a rough enough place withoutadding other people’s stupid shit to the list of challenges. We seek that haven of home where there isbalance and peace, a refuge if you will, without the madness walking throughthe front door.

Despite our best efforts the drama queens are outthere and the best you can do is always be prepared, stock up on duct tape andpick yourself up a tire iron. Stop bythe Home Depotor Lowes today and get your kit to create and maintain yourown Drama Free Zone.

A word of thanks to some great Americans from Michigan

2011-12-08T20:40:00.001+04:30

Every once in a while you get that piece of mail that blowsyour mind in a good way. While I absolutelylove the cards my wife sends, not to mention her care packages, I got afantastic surprise in the mail today from a very unexpected address.

It seems the 7^th and 8^th graders atPathfinder School in Pinckney, Michigan, were getting some instruction onVeteran’s Day this last month and one of the culminating results was a hugeenvelope full of some very colorful ‘Thank You’ cards from the students. I should mention here that my absolutelyadorable cousin happens to be their teacher and she is and has always been anardent supporter of the military.

I’d initially thought to write a private letter to the classbut what strikes me is that these kids, their families and many schools andcommunities around Michigan have had a rough go, yet they took the time to thinkof Soldiers. It’s really touching. So I think it’s only appropriate to offer mypublic thanks and a few words to the students at Pathfinder School in Pinckney:

First, let me just say thank you for your cards and the kindwords you shared. It means an awful lotto me personally, but especially as a Soldier, to receive such a wonderful andgenuine package of handwritten cards from all of you. It’s uplifting to know that students in someof our schools learn about Veterans Day and understand enough about themilitary to know that some days can be very difficult, especially when we areaway from our families.

I’m sure Mrs. Thompson has told you that we volunteer forthese deployments today so that when you finish school, you won’t have to comehere and be away from your families. Ithink the last thing any of us want is for our kids today to have to fight awar. Your kind thoughts has redoubled mymotivation to see this through.

I feel especially proud that all of these cards came from aschool in Michigan because that’s where I grew up and called home right upuntil I joined the Army.

Before I go I wanted to answer a couple of the comments thatcame up in your cards:

Alyssa, I think it’sgreat that you and your family adopt a veteran for the holidays. I’m sure it means a lot to them to be able tospend the holidays with a nice family.

Tyler, the workhere can be very hard sometimes. Some ofour Soldiers work very long hours and some have very dangerous jobs. The important thing to remember is that we’retrying to help the Afghan people secure their country so terrorists can neveruse it as a base and attack our country like they did in 2001. We’re getting close to our goal but still havework to do.

Peyton, I wasreally honored to read your card and learn that you have family who served inVietnam. I’m sure you’re very proud ofyour grandpa, I know I’m very proud of all of our Vietnam veterans and theydeserve a long overdue thanks from each of us. Things are going okay for us and I expect to be home just after theholidays so thank you for asking. Onelast note for you, keep playing hard with your hockey team but remember that nomatter how good the individual player is, it takes a team to play together inorder to win. Good luck with the rest ofyour season---I’m a big hockey fan.

Lindsay, we getplenty of food but it’s never nearly as good as the food we get at home. Because I work with a lot of Europeansoldiers, we eat things that many Americans aren’t really used to but it’s goodto try different things sometimes. Thereare a lot of rice and pasta dishes, which I like.

Emily, your letterwas very special. I wish there was morethat we could do for our fallen warriors, like your cousin. It is sad whenever we lose a Soldier but knowthat we always take time out to honor those Soldiers, like your cousin, whomake the ultimate sacrifice for our country. It’s a debt we can never fully repay to the families who have lostsomeone. You and yours are in my prayersand I can’t thank you enough for sharing your letter with me.

One of the common threads in all of the notes was what agreat teacher Mrs. Thompson is and it’s clear to me that you all think a lot ofher. I would just tell you that I thinknot only is Mrs. Thompson a great teacher and a great American, she’s theabsolute best cousin this Soldier could ever have and I have some pretty coolcousins.

I’ll close by saying best of luck through the rest of yourschool year and have a wonderful holiday break. Thank you very much for thinking of all of us who are deployed and knowthat your letters are a real inspiration. You’ve made me very proud to be a Soldier from the State of Michigan.

Sincerely,

Master Sergeant Tom Clementson

ISAF Joint Command

Kabul, Afghanistan

Another method for living

2011-12-04T14:46:00.001+04:30

I readsomething interesting a while back, “Miracles come in a moment. Be ready and willing.”

I thinkthere is something very simple yet profound in that phrase. Makes me think about those Black Swans; a very simple yet difficultproposition that basically challenges us to live with our peripheral view wideopen because the most potentially life-changing events exists there but onlyfor a short time.

We spend somuch of our time looking either straight ahead or directly behind. Rarely do we allow ourselves the time to turnour attention to the periphery. Evenwhen we do and that feeling rises from our gut, we more often than not resumeour eyes front approach to life. We goback to living in a world with limits where many things are possible ratherthan a world without limits where everything is possible.

Why are weso reluctant to take a chance, a wild stab based on a hunch on an opportunitythat only came in from the side view? For one, we couldn’t see it coming. These are the kinds of things where the outcome is difficult to predictand we are taught early on to err on the side of caution, to weigh pros andcons and hedge our bets.

It remindsme of a Costner film, “Tin Cup” where the hero has every opportunity to win the tournamentif he plays the remainder of the hole in two shots, he simply has to beconservative and lay it up. Instead hegoes for the one in a million shot to try and hit the green in one. He misses of course, and misses many moretimes on that hole but it wasn’t about winning for him, it was about hitting thatimprobable shot.

Sometimes ourgoals are nothing more than simple avenues to help us find the true miracle inour lives. Unfortunately we become sofixated on what we perceive to be the final destination that we miss thosehidden gems along the way.

Yes, we arevery horizontal or vertical people but rarely both simultaneously.

Certainly wehave to be mindful of certain risks when we are responsible for a family. Certainly there are life and death situationswhere we must err on the side of caution. The real tragedy is missing those every day instances to look from thecorner of our eyes and to slow down and take in everything.

There arecountless stories, amazing examples of individuals taking that chance on a whimby finding a small seam of hope and seizing it. The story of Chris Gardner is probably the best example I can relate toyou. It was captured in a movie called “The Pursuit of Happiness”. There are many others and if you haven’t read “The Alchemist” I suggest you do.

I hear fromfriends and acquaintances daily about how troubled they are with their lives inone sense or another. How they regretnot making a different decision or making a decision too late. All I can think is that they are still missingthe most significant point, regretting the decisions not made.

Life goesforward and part of being an adult is living with the choices we make andmaking the best of the aftermath. Forsome it is easy, life is good. Forothers it is much more challenging. In anycase however, I would say there is ample room for the kind of joy and happinesswe all deserve if only we were willing to risk living a life without limits andallowed ourselves to exist in a 360 degree sphere.

Take youreyes from the ball for a moment and be amazed at what you discover, who youdiscover. It may surprise you to find that a subtle glance to the left or right can grow into something profound. You might also learn that the best dreams cannot be captured rather, they are unknowingly nurtured and bloom at the moment of our greatest need.

These can be your miracles if only youare ready and willing to see.

A Method of Living

2011-11-27T20:53:00.001+04:30

Photo by Rinni

Every once in a while I’ll start writing with a theme or thought in mind and it starts to go all over the place. This is one that I decided to dust off and post it in parts. The notes were taken during my Greek vacation a couple of years ago. The crux of it is about how I choose to walk the road. It may seem that I’m making some judgments, and maybe I am, but it’s simply a method to put my pace into some context. If you’re open-minded and confident then read on.

As an American culture it seems to me that we are very caught up in the daily grind to the extent that we wear the workaholic badge with pride. From the 40-hour work week and one-hour lunch break to the two-week vacations we thrust ourselves through it all.

It’s the relaxation time that concerns me today because it seems that we try to cram too much stuff into our annual two weeks of rest and end up missing out on the whole point. We make these checklists and run at break-neck speed to only barely check the blocks and it’s those blocks that seem to determine success or failure. The result is that our vacation becomes the very grind we sought to escape.

An example is a family I spoke to while in Athens who were on a typical U.S. style vacation. They flew for nine + hours and checked into a chain hotel and participated in every guided tour they could get themselves into. There was little research done on the country or culture, save for the tips they received from the travel agent back in the states. To be fair, when you’re as busy as this family is you’d need a little help organizing this sort of trip. The agent’s focus was efficiently using the family’s vacation budget to get them the most quantity and volume.

Photo by Tom

It was evident to me that they were glad to be there and that the ruins in Greece had made an impression because they enthusiastically discussed their appreciation for what the ancient Greeks had to employ in order to create these incredible cultural marvels.

One of the adults mentioned how nice it would have been to see it all before time and elements wore them all down. The real interesting point she made was that they regretted not being able to take their time on this vacation and that it would be nice to come back and stroll through Athens rather than rush through it.

Life is a race

That feeling expressed by the American tourists really got me thinking about how we approach life and particularly our free time. There are so many people these days who fill every waking moment with self generated noise and physical action. Truly living to me is the reason I walk slowly, stop often, and remain silent throughout.

On any given day in Greece I might spend a total of 20 minutes on the phone and a few 30 second bursts talking to people, offering to shoot a picture for some American tourists or ordering some food. I think most people would probably find the time in between boring but it is so much easier to catch everything that’s going on around me when I am still and silent. This way of being allows me to extend all of the senses, taking in everything from texture, color, volume and tone to the multitude of smells, both sharp and subtle. It’s like a theater of the mind that gives you an internal appreciation for a more complete ambiance.

It’s that need to truly feel these things that encourages me to find that state of quiet reflection. You can’t do that when you are compelled to constantly move and jabber.

The precious few

Photo by Tom

My close friends are rare because they know the balance. In a group setting over dinner they are lively and entertaining conversationalists. However, after climbing through an ancient village and up a slope to reach the tallest point on the island we’re visiting, there isn’t a word spoken. That is a gift that allows each of us to go off the beaten path and take in the sights and sounds from city below or the small church nestled in the pines. The discussion is tabled until after we’ve all had our fill.

It’s why I appreciate my wife. We can read, draw or write and be completely lost in the fiction or take a hike through the hall of mosses without a word spoken allowing both of us to appreciate and stimulate that theater of the mind. She is so rare and only on a couple of occasions have I ever found others who can just take it in and savor a moments like those without a million interruptions or questioning, “what’s wrong”---to which I generally reply, “other than someone talking everything else is very right”.

Appreciating the natural ambience is why one of my favorite places to live will always be one with a salty breeze and crashing waves. One of those places for me was Waimea Bay as the sun begins to peak out over the water with its promise of a warm day. Those were mostly solitary moments but I had occasionally shared them with one friend or another before diving into the ocean to find sea turtles. Ah, how I love snorkeling with the muted underwater sounds.

Maybe…no, certainly that’s one of the key elements that was missing in some of my friendships, particularly when I was dating. I don’t get why people can’t see that all that jabbering is counterproductive. I still perceive all that noise-making as a sign of discomfort or a lack of confidence. I lose patience with those kinds of people.

I gravitate toward people who talk when it matters and about something with value. I value the instances where my senses are allowed to explore more freely paved the way for some incredible conversations but it always starts without the words…words can come later. Those are the moments that truly make me feel alive, when I’ve had a chance to take it all in and share it later.

Photo by Tom

Living isn’t about cataloging each stop seen, song heard, or topic discussed. Living for me is taking in each experience in its sensory whole, sometimes shared and sometimes alone, with nothing more the ocean of life around me and savoring every drop.

That’s my cup of tea, how I like to do the day to day outside work. That’s also the beautiful think about this world we live in, it’s full of all different sorts of folks who do things in all different sorts of ways. I think that no matter what path you walk, what’s important is that it’s a path you chose and that you’re able to walk it to the beat of your own drum.

Finding My One

2011-11-22T21:27:00.001+04:30

Every once in a while I attempt to write something other than a simple blog post. I felt like pulling this one out of the attic to share with you, a poem I wrote for my wife during my last deployment. It's not something you'd ever find published but it reminds me that she is always there with me, like the beat of my heart.

Finding My One
By Tom Clementson

You ask,how can I write words that seemingly saunter

Flowingacross time’s endless pages

Recountinga love of infinite ages

Overdesert paths and smoke filled skies

A heartinvisibly, unknowingly searched and sought

For theOne, with your familiar, determined eyes

From yourkind and loving words that inspired

To alonging look of primal desire

My fingerstrace your cheek and deeply I taste your lips

Thatfamiliar touch and our uncounted blessings

Yoursoothing tones and conversational flows

Merely outline adestined match of knowing souls

Yourperfect imperfections,

From the very beginning I have loved every part

Culminating to a point in my awestruck heart

Of thisblessing, of your love

Comes amotivation to earn and be worthy,

Of a life lived and bound with integrity

The funnyfaces

Andeasy paces

Marks thisincredible and indelible life together

Thoughtsof you and so simply they come,

Heartfeltprose, borne of my pure sense of veneration

Words forall that you are, inspired by my One

A Sci-Fi Rumble in the Jungle

2011-11-17T21:05:00.001+04:30

Gabriel's Return by Steve Umstead
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Power up your Oso-11 heavy assault rifle and join Evan Gabriel’s team as they face a new threat on an old battlefield in Steve Umstead’s second novel in the Evan Gabriel Trilogy, ‘Gabriel’s Return’.

Picking up the story six months after the conclusions of the first book, Umstead instills in you a false sense of security and normalcy so that he can leverage his plot and jerk the rug out from under you and his characters. This book is loaded with more than enough hi-tech action but Umstead finds balance and depth by presenting a more complex plot and delves much deeper into his characters.

Click here for the rest of the review!

What Lockout?

2011-11-15T21:22:00.001+04:30

A New York Times news alert popped up on my iPad today witha breaking story. Normally when thosepop up I get a little nervous since it’s usually bad news and I am inAfghanistan after all, the center for the media’s constant doom and gloomcoverage…but that’s another story.

No, this story had to do with the National BasketballAssociation players union turning down a deal likely resulting in a cancelledseason. Something else written in thereabout it being the owners last offer, the union decertifying, blah, blah, blah.

I didn’t even realize there was a lockout, let alone an NBAseason to risk for that matter. No, myNBA-watching days died a while ago. Inthe 80’s and 90’s I loved watching Magic versus Bird, then Magic versus IsaiahThomas, then Isaiah Thomas versus Jordan…it went on until Jordan retired thefirst time and the leagues sort of went…well, blah.

My interest was rekindled a bit a few years back when thePistons started contending and had some epic battles with San Antonio. I liked that Navy guy on their team beforeand they seemed pretty solid. But thensome trades and the NBA went back into the….well, blah.

So the headline popped up today and it got me thinking aboutwhy I don’t really care about basketball. First I should clarify, I like watching the NCAA tournament every yearbut I haven’t watched an NBA game in years and really have no desire to, thoughwhen I was a kid I do remember really liking the league. I spent a good bit of time trying to figureout why I sort of loathe the league and I think I figured it out.

It’s not the players or owners, it’s both…and the league.

Watching the league story lines the last several years readslike a bad series of Dear Abby’s. If itwasn’t Allen Iverson bitching about being punished by Coach Brown for missing…practice,it was a Kobe sex scandal, followed by Mark Cuban being fined for tellingeveryone the officials sucked. Newsflash---they did, in fact one was on the take and ended up beingpart of a major scandal.

The players went from being respectable role models era tothe vast majority of America during the Magic – Jordan to some awful series ofcover photos for a hip-hop magazine. Just so happens I like the music but choose not to dress or act thepart. Maybe I just can’t relate given I’malmost 40 but I have little trouble rooting for guys like Curtis Granderson(even though he’s a Yankee now) or Cam Ward from the Hurricanes; good dudes. No, can’t be that because I’ve had no troublekeeping up with baseball, football or hockey through the ages…just basketball.

About the only guy in the NBA that I can honestly say I likeis Mark Cuban because the guy is about winning and calls it like he sees iteven if the league is going to fine him. The dude genuinely loves his players, the sport and his city. Can’t for the life of me figure out why heseems to be the only one with real passion for the sport.

Maybe they should just crack his DNA, add several inches tohis height, some agility and dexterity and clone enough of him to make a newleague. That would be entertaining, exciting basketball and would probably result in a lot of give back to the fans and community,something I haven’t seen in a long time from the NBA.

Lost season? No, theentire league has been lost for a while now.

A gift for the hard days

2011-11-13T14:13:00.001+04:30

We all run into hard times, sometimes for a day and sometimes much longer. Every so often I have them and seem to always find inspiration, generally from those around me. Sometimes however, it's just not enough but there were some words I discovered during a deployment to Iraq that seem to pull me out of the most severe cases of the doldrums. This gift of words is a succinct reminder that tells us that we can and must take charge of our lives at the worst of times. Tuck this away when that rainy day feels like a storm pouring down on you and find the inspiration to get up and fight.
Invictus
By William Ernest Henley

Out of the night that covers me,

Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

Looking at the numbers

2011-11-12T15:20:00.001+04:30

AP Photo

Here’s where I normally write a few paragraphs on my hopefor a good outcome at the weekly Michigan game. It’s usually laden with jabs at rivals, a little statistical insight onopponents and confidence that our head coach will lead the team to overcome.

Nothing against Wolverine head coach Brady Hoke or the fineyoung men on his team but I just don’t have it in me this week. I’ve spent the past several days trying tounderstand how an institution like Penn State University can be hijacked so completely that its mostsenior officials ignored criminal acts against children for ten years inorder to preserve its reputation.

The word reputation in this case is nothing more thana codename for money. As I mentioned tothe Freep’s Drew Sharp today, it came down to one question, “What will youignore for $51 million a year?” That’sthe revenue Penn State football generated last year and what their senior officials wereprotecting. That’s 51 million reasons why people like JoePaterno could literally call the shots on campus for the last 30 years orso.

That’s why this is not just about Penn State. It is about looking at every program at every institution and asking some hardquestions and figuring out where the line is drawn. It also goes beyond football, waybeyond. It’s looking at the whole moralazimuth of our communities throughout the country, all of our institutionswhether it’s a college or a church group.

While some are right to use this tragedy as a way to raiseawareness, it does no good when people choose to do wrong for $51 million inincentives. And now we’re supposed tofix it with ads and checks, or with symbolic statements during pregame andhalftime?

I guess it’s a start.

AP Photo

I feel some relief seeing pictures of students and facultywith posters and blue ribbons standing up for the victims of Jerry Sandusky’salleged crimes but it’s symbolism and nothing more. Sure it will add to the coffers of someanti-abuse charities and that’s not a bad thing but we’re missing somethingfundamental here.

How does a game becomeso important to some, so lucrative that it stretches beyond the laws of theland and the laws of humanity? How havewe let our moral azimuth get so askew that the fanaticism over a game causes usto protest on behalf of its iconic figures, when they are responsible forallowing children to be sexually abused?

Tony Dungy, America’s coach and role model dad, suggested weuse this as an opportunity to talk to our kids. It doesn’t go far enough because we must takethe herculean step and evaluate this entire system because every scandal that has touched the NCAA inrecent times has somehow involved money. Take it out of the equation and end the rule sports programs have on ourinstitutions of higher learning, and apparently the criminal justice system.

We can find a way to have and enjoy sports in ourcommunities without letting the revenue it generates consume our betterjudgment. For God’s sake we shouldn’teven be talking about “revenue” in college sports---make it non-profit aftercovering operating costs. Take away themoney aspect of it and there is no longer incentive for corruption and criminalbehavior.

These games we play aresupposed to be about fun, teaching sportsmanship, work ethic, and so many othervaluable lessons to our kids. Theproblem is when you look at the biggest college programs in the country theyare constantly under some kind of investigation for breaking rules. It’s ironic that by and large they are themost significant revenue generators in the NCAA and this is the real messagesports sends the kids in our society.

Don’t get it twisted.

Jerry Sandusky (center) photo by AP

I don’t blame college sports for JerrySandusky’s alleged criminal behavior but a select group of men protecting abig-money college sports program are at the very center of how he was allowed tocontinue preying on children. These were people who could have done something about it but came up with 51 million reasonsto take an approach of indifference and not rock the boat.

51 million reasons to ignore the sick slapping sound of Jerry Sandusky anally raping a tenyear-old boy pinned up against the shower wall at the sports complex on PennState, if McQueary tells it right.

51 million reasons to ignore a janitor’s claim that he saw JerrySandusky forcing oral sex on an 11 year-old.

There are plenty of reasons I could find to cheer for theWolverines this weekend but the math is simple for me and it’s the one reason Ican’t be a raving college football fan right now. I'll likely listen to the game just to get some perspective more than anything.

For Drew’s column – click here

Next steps - sorting out the aftermath at PSU

2011-11-11T22:53:00.001+04:30

Bob Wojnowski, Detroit News

I regularly follow Detroit News columnist Bob Wojnowski for his wit and humorous approach to covering the sports stories from my home state and around the country. I also spend a little time bantering with some of his colleagues on Twitter and e-mail because they are good, fun people.

Today, like many in the past week is not a day for banter or jokes. Bob's words in his weekly column express what a lot of sports fans are feeling at the moment; confusion, outrage, sadness, and many other things that are about 180 degrees from the things we normally feel about the sports and teams we love.

Whether you talk to Angilique Chengelis, Jamie Samuelsen, or the Free Press' Michael Rosenberg, sports is not the topic in most of our minds with the aftershocks of this awful situation at PSU still waiting for resolution, which may be far off. More than anything, most of us feel awful about what happened to these kids and don't know what to do about it, but celebrating a weekly game seems far off the mark.

I'd share with you some of Bob's thoughts on the subject because today I just can't find words of my own to add. I think, like Michael Rosenberg wrote today, there is so much positive that can be done to make a difference in the wake of this horrific series of events, but first we have to address the remaining issues of today and get the right perspective.
Columnists | Protest all you want, but Joe Paterno's not the victim | The Detroit News

Board intervenes, charts right path

2011-11-10T15:45:00.002+04:30

AP Photo

The Penn State University board of trustees made a difficultand conscious decision to do the right thing in light of one of the worstscandals in sports history by firing their long-standing and revered headfootball coach, Joe Paterno.

While many questions still remain, this was astep that had to be taken to show that an institution touted for honor andleadership could make the right decisions and truly lead by example. More importantly, the board demonstrated to thecountry that they value human life over a storied coach and his sportsprogram’s reputation. Their positionseems to say doing the right thing is non-negotiable, even when your position may adversely affect a program that generates revenue for the university in themillions of dollars.

It’s about so much more than a game.

It is disappointing to see a man, who many of us grew upidolizing for his talk of leadership and honor by doing the right thing,suddenly cast out in disgrace. It ismore disappointing that more than eight children were molested under his watch,one of whom he knew about but failed to notify legal authorities. Though the coach did not commit the act, didnot personally see the act, he was clearly privy to wrongdoing and through inactionhe enabled a deviant to continue abusing children.

There are many involved in this tragic series of events whoare culpable, some more so. We’ve heardabout the arrests and firings of several figures at the university, includingits former president, who knew something and did nothing or very little. There will likely be more as theinvestigation continues. It’s possible,as some have said that some authorities outside the university failed to act inthe best interests of the children.

It’s an emotional time for all of us with children, forthose who love sports, and for the students and alumni at Penn State. Everything we thought we knew was thrown intochaos over the weekend when this tragic story broke. Pressure for the coach to resign as factsbecame known brought out an emotional response from many of us. But put it into perspective, at least eightpeople have had to live with this inner turmoil for years.

While we’ve believed the Paterno fairytale that all was wellin Happy Valley, these kids have had to choke down the truth that none of uswanted to see. Its revelation isshocking and difficult to come to grips with but fortunately it’s no longer adiscussion about sports, it’s now about a legal process that should have begunten years ago, were it not for a game and its reputation.

Sports is supposed to be a vehicle for bringing out the bestin children and young men and women, not a vehicle for a deviant to prey onthem and break them down. In the endjustice will be served in the courts. The court of public opinion is a chaotic thing however and feelingsamongst some on campus are confused.

AP Photo

Some feel the board erred in their decision and others takeit as an indictment on their school and what it has stood for over thedecades. I hope they realize that theirreputation is not about one man or a small group of men. One man does not determine the values andfate of such a vast group. It takes thecollective efforts of the entire institution that create an environment ofhonor, trust, doing the hard right thing over the easy wrong, and standing upfor principles no matter the cost.

A leader can provide a vision and guidance but ultimately itis about the collective actions of the many that define that institution. It requires strong leaders to build the kindof community Penn State is renowned for, and your board of trustees has takenan important step in showing us all what right should look like. We all should be grateful that these leaders refused to let the inaction of few define their community, which was built on the efforts and actions of so many.

That's really the point of all this, moving to the next chapter. Removing Paterno and the rest who did nothing, puts the focus solely back on Jerry Sandusky and the sexual abuse charges. We must learn the whole truth about what happened and how, so that as justice is served, conditions can be set so that something like this can never happen again.

“

The past several days have been absolutely terrible for the entire Penn State community. But the outrage that we feel is nothing compared to the physical and psychological suffering that allegedly took place.

”-- John P. Surma,
vice chair of the board of trustees
ESPN Graphic

PSU scandal reveals true colors

2011-11-09T13:24:00.002+04:30

AP Photo

You see the true colors come out in people in the midst ofinstitutional crisis and with only a handful of days passed since the initialbreaking reports centering on former Penn State football coordinator JerrySandusky’s horrendous acts on children, the colors seem to run the spectrum.

Many journalists and key figures in college football areshowing a complete disconnect from the human aspect in all of this; theirrevocable damage done to young boys by a trusted, and apparently protectedfigure who was part an institution built on money and reputation. There are growing examples of this lack ofperspective in comments made by some including former college football coach Bobby Bowden who seemed to offer advice to Paterno on how to prepare for the next game, toinclude ignoring questions about Paterno’s possible complacency in the matterof failing to report crimes against children to police authorities. Yes Bobby, to you the game is far moreimportant than some pesky criminal charges.

Then a story in yesterday’s USA Today focused on howPaterno’s legacy would likely be tarnished no matter his culpability incovering up or ignoring these crimes. The sad part about that article was that exactly one line references anyharm done to children or the crimes in general, while the rest lamented the ding on the head coach’sreputation. I was appalled by thearticle and shared some comments with Detroit News reporter Jamie Samuelsen whotweeted to me that everyone involved should be cleared out, to include thejanitor (alleged witness of one incident).

I think we were both a littlesick that so many initial story lines seemed to offer pity for a coach and aninstitution rather than the children who had been sexually abused and thenignored by so many who should have reported what they knew to the police. One of the alleged victims was only 10 yearsold and the forced sodomy that was allegedly witnessed and reported to Paternodeserved to have someone stand up for him. Apparently the coach, the witness, and the other senior officials thatwere told, were all more interested on protecting the reputation of their belovedprogram and the school than protecting a helpless child from being raped by oneof their cronies.

Then early yesterday the New York Times broke a story thatuniversity officials were working the process for removing Joe Paterno as headcoach. Some speculated that it may beimmediate however, other sources indicated that the university would likely lethim finish the season rather than further tarnish his dignity.

What about the dignity of the 11 year-old whowas forced to perform oral sex on Sandusky in the showers on campus, whichhappened to also be witnessed and reported to athletic department officialswith no effort to notify police? Whoprotected his dignity by seeking justice and an end to this empowerment of a pedophile?

There were some however, who stepped to the forefront and took ahuman approach to include Detroit Free Press sports columnist MichaelRosenberg. Notable for his wit-laden, humorous columns, Rosenberg was more direct incalling for Paterno’s ouster. His focuswas correctly on the criminality of this story, rather than recruiting impacts on thefootball program or Paterno’s place in college football lore as many seem to be concerned with. Rosenberg called for justice for the childrenwho were sexually abused.

ESPN Image

Former Penn State standout and NFL commentator, Matt Millen offeredperhaps the most insightful comments during an interview on ESPN. While calling for people to abide by theinvestigative process and not rush to judgment, he clearly made no excuses for what was alleged to have occurred andwas poignant in saying that crimes against children demand justice. He called on Penn State to be truthful aboutwhat happened and face the “locomotive” that is bearing down on them.

While I rarely agree with many of Millen’s points onfootball, you cannot question his points as a man who was part of thatinstitution and knows all of the individuals from the school who were apparently involved. What gives me so much respectfor him is that despite his connections and love of the institution, he approaches this as a human being and adad, not a protector of a football program’s reputation.

People like Rosenberg and Millen have been the exception in whole disgusting affair and have clearly not been heard on the PSU campuswhere following the breaking story that Paterno may lose his job, hundredsgathered at the Paterno home for what has been characterized as a pep rally. Another blow to the childrenPaterno likely left to a pedophile’s devices. Another disgusting indictment on our society that seems to place afigure whose reputation is built on a “game” over the lives of young boys. Yes, the fans at PSU seem to say it’s okay to look the other way when a child is raped so long as there is asolid team on the field next Saturday.

In all this the NCAA stands silent. No tattoos were purchased and practicesdidn’t exceed the standard time limits. No recruits were called or texted more than allowed by the rules sothe NCAA has no bone to pick. Thatbusiness about young boys being sexually assaulted in an NCAA-sanctionedfacility isn’t worth talking about.

Right, now tell me the NCAA isn’t solely focused onmulti-million dollar television deals among other lucrative projects. We’re only talking about a few kids versus aninstitution build on cronyism and money but happens to be one of those schools that has been the poster-child for the NCAA.

Silence is consent.

So the university is faced with coming up with an exitstrategy on its own. Does the coachfinish the season, while authorities continue to investigate? Does he get canned based on what has alreadybeen reported to the grand jury? I’lltake something Millen said to heart, about following a process, even though itseems no one at the school followed any legal process in this matter. Maybe Paterno should be suspended while factsare sorted out. There clearly seems tobe more than enough pointing to his complicacy.

At some point it has to be about the kids who were hurt and not about afootball program. At some point realleaders need to step up and offer a role model for the masses at PSU becauseturning the other way in the face of a crime is inexcusable. Empowering someone to rape children to saveface for a football program is inexcusable and after the rally at Paterno’shouse yesterday I am certain there are hundreds at PSU who cannot possiblydifferentiate between right and wrong.

AP Photo at Paterno Rally Tuesday

Joe Paterno did come out of his house to address the crowdand said, "It's hard for me to tell you how much this means to me. I'velived for this place, and I've lived for people like you guys and girls, andI'm just so happy to see that you could feel so strongly about us and aboutyour school. The kids that were victims or whatever they want to say, I thinkwe all ought to say a prayer for them. Tough life, when people do certainthings to you. Anyway, you've been great. Everything's great, all right."

Right Joe, ‘or whatever they want to say’.

At least now we’re seeing the true colors of your rainbow inHappy Valley.

A sickening lesson in sports

2011-11-08T12:33:00.000+04:30

The story from State College, Pa. gets worse as the clockticks and if the charges of a cover-up by Penn State University officialswasn’t itself disgusting, the way some on the sports beat are covering this story places the exclamation point on one of the most horrendous stories in more thana decade.

Over the weekend, real news reporters shared this gruesomestory of a trusted adult, a key figure in his community, who allegedly sexuallyassaulted as many as eight young boys. We went on to learn from legitimate “news” reporters that seniorofficials at the university likely knew about the allegations and later lied toa grand jury to cover it up. That chargeitself is another crime against these children in my opinion.

AP Photo

But today as I scan through the headlines of some of ournation’s top media outlets I’m seeing a mixed bag of reports. Some in the news media wonder who else mighthave known about and concealed these crimes, head coach Joe Paterno is amongthose being scrutinized. Other storiestoday, mostly written by a few “sports” reporters, lament the tarnishthis could have on the famed coach’s legacy.

I’m absolutely disgusted that this ink is published now. I got it, Joe Paterno is a legendary coach,but when you position a legacy built around a “game” above the fold, over thecriminality of this whole tragedy, then I have to question the reporter, theeditor and the publication’s moral compass. Who cares about Jo-Pa’s legacy when you have children who have beenvictimized and continued to be scarred because a university covered up one ofthe most heinous crimes our society knows?

People need to put his in perspective because the last timeI checked, college football was a “game”. How does a coach’s legacy, no matter howaccomplished he was as a coaching in this sport, deserve any attentionnow? We have children who werecriminally violated so unless he was tied to or complicit there is no way we should be talking about his legacy.

It makes me wonder if the big money college footballgenerates doesn’t drive the social and media narrative to place a coach abovesexual assault victims, and victimized children no less.

I wonder how many in and around the university were firstconcerned with a tarnished legacy before it hit them that this was a disgustingcrime against children. I wonder ifthere aren’t some in that big circle who have yet to understand that this storyshould be about child victims and a disgusting perpetrator rather than acoach’s legacy or a football program’s legacy. Apparently some in the sports media value a “game” over a child, a humanbeing whose emotions will be tangled and scarred for the rest of theirlife.

What this story shows me is that a crime against innocentchildren weighs less on some of our collective consciences than the secondaryeffect it may have on some third party’s legacy. I’m learning that things like the “game”, legacyand money are what truly drive our sports world.

I’m learning that besides the people who mayhave lied and covered-up these crimes, a segment of the sports media are alsoenablers by devaluing the worth of the victims and placing their sacred sportsfigures above them. Maybe some of these hacks can take the game hat off and be human again, a lesson they could certainly learn in all this.

I’m learning a lot about the sports world I didn’t need to know, but now I do, and it sickens me.

Why I Came Back: Reason Six

2011-11-03T00:33:00.001+04:30

For six weeks I've shared the thoughts and insights behind my decision to come back to Afghanistan for another consecutive tour. True, I miss my family like crazy but there were so many things that pulled me back and after talking to my wife we both realized that it was something that needed doing.

Reason 6: The Leader

I think it’s rare, even in the military, to find leaders youcan follow instinctively because of a deep respect you have for their grasp ofthe job at hand, their ability to bring a team together and a trust that allowsthem to put every person in a position to make a difference. That was what it was like every day that Iworked at Combined Joint Task Force 82 under then Maj. GeneralScaparrotti. In a division with moreswagger and type-A personalities than you could shake a static line at, wefielded a team that accomplished significant progress in easternAfghanistan. I have no doubt that it wasbecause of his ability to enable the entire team to perform with theirindividual talents and experience that led us to success in executing hiscampaign. All ranks were expected tobring their A-game and encouraged to share their ideas. So it should be no surprise that shortlyafter returning to Fort Bragg, N.C., an offer was presented to work with “TheBoss” in Afghanistan again, there was no question in my mind. Five months into this deployment I miss myfamily but I have no regrets or second thoughts.

Five Really Cool Things

2011-10-31T16:27:00.000+04:30

With November finally here I have about two months to spend a littletime thinking about how best to spend my two-week break with the family. Normally a mid-tour leave from Afghanistanconsists of a trip to Europe or some other exotic place but when the kids arein school it makes sense to stay close to home. Fortunately there seems to be plenty to do in the Pacific Northwest so I’mdoing my homework and trying to plot a course of action. I’ve got some pretty good ideas but I’llcertainly take any suggestions you might have to offer.

So here are a few of my ideas on things to do on leave:

Great Wolf Lodge and Water Park: I have to give credit to Rinni for this onebecause back in June when I was preparing to leave she suggested that if I camehome in winter, our options would be very skewed. That’s why an indoor water park with all theperks seemed like a great idea. Mybiggest consideration is to find something our twins (9) will enjoy and sinceboth swim like little fish it makes perfect sense. The Great Wolf also has plenty for big kidslike Rinni and I so while the boys are wrapped up with one of the large kidgroup programs, we can take a detour to the spa. It’s a bit expensive but I’m sure the boyswill love it and we’ll enjoy the family-friendly fun.

Crab Pot: Speaking ofMischief and Mayhem, one of their favorite places to eat happens to be indowntown so the Crab Pot is a must. Tyler has the ability to eat two adult-sized portions all on his own andthe window shopping and outdoor market should help us work up and appetite. Lots of variety and quality seafood with reasonableprices makes this a favorite stop for locals and tourists.

Space Needle: Ofcourse if the weather is frightful we’ll still have to work up an appetite so I’m thinking a trek up to the top of the Space Needle would do thetrick. Anchoring the Seattle skyline,this is one of the spots the boys have really wanted to see sincewe moved to the area. It’s timeto make good and take the trip, though it will be interesting to see how theboys like heights of that magnitude. A nicegander at the city and sound, a family photo or two and we’ll be on our way tothe museums below.

Vancouver vs. Detroit: For me, just spending time with my beautiful wife and two littlemonsters is all I need for this vacation but since we’re exploring all options,I think a couple of tickets to the greatest game on earth is in order;professional ice hockey. It just happensthat the Red Wings and Canucks are playing in Vancouver on February 2, while I’mhome but we may have to work with the scalpers since they are already just aboutsold out. Being a Wings fan my wholelife I can’t think of a better treat coming home from a combat zone.

Number five I have to keep to myself since Rinnioccasionally reads this blog and this one is all about her. To me there is nothing more beautiful orrewarding than bringing her a smile so number five absolutely is all about somequality time with the person I love most.

Of course these are just a few things I’m considering for R&Rleave this winter but I’m always open to suggestions so if you have good ideasor know where I can score hockey tickets, then drop a comment and pass it on.

Reviewing Low Town

2011-10-28T14:28:00.001+04:30

Low Town by Daniel Polansky
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Meet the Warden of Low Town, a pure survivor in this post-apocalyptic world where plague decimated the population, likely setting the stage for a war that took even more lives on both sides. From a struggling street orphan to battlefield leader, he ascends to the top in a special operations investigative unit charged with maintaining order by any means necessary. Eventually the laws of gravity and women initiate the Warden’s fall from grace, leaving him back on the streets of Low Town, where he reinvents his identity using the tools he has learned as a survivor.

The Warden is a self-made man in the local drug trade after dethroning a syndicate to carve out his territory. He’s not a thug but there is clearly a very dark side to this man, as he maintains a delicate balance between criminal entrepreneur and neighborhood guardian angel. It’s that last aspect of the Warden that pulls him back into his former investigator roll where multiple factions look to either manipulate or destroy him before he can unmask a sinister killer who leverages dark magic to murder children and cover the trail.

This is Daniel Polansky’s debut novel that takes you to the dregs of a society trying to redefine itself after plague and war. There are no ‘good guys versus bad guys’ in this read; only varying degrees of bad guys who exist in this world after anarchy where the unwritten laws of the street are still based on individual survival due to a disinterested ruling class.

From the outset you can feel the grime littering the streets come off the pages and see the grey-cast gloom in the sky. There is a building tension throughout the book that parallels the detailed actions as the Warden hunts the anonymous child killer. It’s uncovering this society through the Warden’s interpersonal relationships with the variety racial and social backgrounds that I found most intriguing and most enlightening from a personal standpoint.

There is plenty of action and entertainment as well and you’ll fly through the pages as this fallen hero closes in on his nemesis. The Warden faces death at multiple turns in a novel where the good guy may not necessarily win but he’ll go down hacking with blade in hand if it comes to that.

It’s also a story of choices and consequences, which leads back to varying degrees of bad in everyone. You’re exposed to interpersonal moral dilemmas where doing evil to serve the greater good is overlooked, but also accrues a debt that must eventually be paid by the laws of karma or nature if not men.

Because of his obvious character flaws, I find it’s easy to root for the Warden. He’s a hard man who also loves those in his inner circle in his own hard way. Honor does not hinder him to do what he must and it is duty to his people in Low Town that drives him. His back story is revealed a spoonful at a time and by the end there are still more questions about what drove this man to the life he leads.

There are plenty of other questions, and a few characters left at the end to set up what should be a great sequel to Polansky’s incredible debut sci-fi, mystery, action-adventure novel. Having just come off a five-book high-fantasy series, this was the perfect change of venue; top notch.

View all my reviews

Back to their roots; bad news for Purdue

2011-10-28T00:49:00.002+04:30

Maybe it was the opponent more than anything that left sucha bitter taste in my mouth after the Wolverines lost their first game, a game Ifelt they could win up until the last minutes. I was hoping for a repeat of the Notre Dame final performance, it just didn’t happen. It was such a bad feeling all I could think about was thenext opportunity to win a big rivalry game. Don’t get me wrong; losing stinks no matterthe opponent, it’s just far worse when it comes at the hands of a rival.

Detroit News Photo

I’ve had a bye week to think about it, read about it andeven watch some clips. With a week and ahalf since the loss in East Lansing, I certainly don’t feel better about theoutcome, but I do feel good about this team. A week ago I would have been willing to squander every game between nowand the meeting against that pro-team from Columbus because a loss there would double that bitter taste.

Not the case anymore.

It’s over the course of the last few days that I’ve beenable to put things into perspective and at the end of the day you have torecognize this team has come a long way in a really short time. Brady Hoke and his staff have worked miraclesin changing the culture, changing the offensive scheme, and revamping thedefense in a matter of weeks and months. His passion for Michigan goes well beyond his contract because here is aguy who signed on to be the head coach of a program adrift without even knowingwhat the job paid. Admittedly this washis dream job, not because of the clout it would earn him, rather because hegenuinely loves this school and its traditions, primarily leadership.

It made even more sense to me reading Michael Rosenberg’scolumn this week about how the team wouldn’t slip in the second half of theseason because of the atmosphere these coaches established and maintain. In my previous blog I would have buggered offevery game but the one on Nov. 26; purely an emotional fan-response toa disappointing loss.

Detroit Free Press Photo

There is no way this Wolverine team can let off the gason anyone between now and the end of November. These kids have bought into everything Hokehas established and they are working hard. Mark Snyder’s column this week goes intodetail on the adjustments and effort from the players and coaches. There is no reasonthey shouldn’t stomp the thunder out of Purdue and Iowa on their way toknocking Illinois down a rung. They’llhave their hands full with Nebraska but who knows where they’ll be when thatone rolls around because there is a lot of growth opportunity between now andthen.

That’s the piece I think I was missing. After losing two weeks ago I’ve noted theteam’s demeanor through the media and atmospherics from those close to the teamand the feeling I get is ‘determined’. Michigan State exposed some weaknesses with their very capable defenseand a little help from Mother Nature. Asmuch as many analysts talk about the Spartan’s run-game, I’d still call it adraw with the Michigan defense. True,the Wolverines got gashed a bit but they dished out some hurt of their own,making some timely stops and creating some turnovers that gave the offense achance.

This has given Hoke and his staff the perfect opportunity toshow what leadership is, especially because they did get knocked down a bit andneed to get back up. They are putting int he work and making the adjustments.

Our Australian General spoke at a dinner here in Afghanistanthe other night with a group of senior enlisted and he focused onleadership. There were three key pointshe talked to us about that a Soldier must understand and emulate to be a goodleader.

1. A leader must beprofessionally competent; an expert in their craft. You can never stop learning because it’s anongoing process.

2. Anyone can leadwhen times are easy but a good leader must have a robustness of spirit thatpicks others up and a resiliency that gets you through stress when you’re tiredand cold.

3. A leader mustunderstand the big picture and how it all fits together – but he must alsoteach his followers to see that big picture as well. Only then can you all go after the same goalin a deliberate and coordinated way.

Those are points a general made to his troops in Afghanistan but probably sound familiar to the men in Brady Hoke's locker room. That’s exactly the path the Wolverines need to stay on, onethat Brady Hoke began months ago, if they are to meet their potential andachieve their season goals. One bump shouldn’ttake away all they’ve done to this point, nor should it hinder them fromreaching their objectives.

Al Borges hasthe right of it in looking at the problems and fixing them as they go, not panickingor throwing his offensive line under the buss. They will all improve and in large part because they havegreat leaders in their coaches and in their players.

Denard Robinson may have had one of his worstgames ever but I bet he’s grinning today, picking up his teammates atpractice. I’m willing to wager the WillHeininger laying the wood to folks this week as he continues to be one of theteam’s best defensive players. You canbe sure that Brady Hoke is continuing to share his vision that this is a roadof one game at a time to the big finale.

This team would have had a hard time getting back up but theseleaders have something to show the rest of the nation, that a Wolverine isferocious, tenacious and methodically resilient.

Not such good news for Purdue.

Week eight prediction from fans in Afghanistan: Michigan over Purdue 34-6

Why I Came Back: Reason Five

2011-10-26T05:33:00.000+04:30

Coming back to Afghanistan was a voluntary choice that hasleft some wondering why another back to back deployment. I have to think that my inner circle had notrouble understanding my reasons. Fromthe outset of this latest adventure I decided that the key to continue drivinghard through the 12 months would be to take the time to reflect on why I cameback.

Reason Number 5: TheVoices

You can’t spot every leader by the uniform or business suitthey wear because some are visibly lost in the midst of the masses. That is the case with Naweed and many of hiscolleagues, all Afghan Journalists. Meeting and getting to know Naweed gave me insight to the passion Afghanshave for establishing and maintaining basic freedoms in their country. To them, people like Naweed represent theirvoice to the movers and shakers in the capitol and around the world. People like Naweed put themselves at greatrisk to tell the story to their fellow citizens, whether it’s an article ongovernment corruption or exposing the Taliban. Just working with us puts them in danger, but still they come and sharetheir experiences and concerns, something I would have never understood hadthey not been willing to take the first step.

Media Day at Bagram Airfield - 2010

These voices of Afghanistan fight to firmly establish a freepress in order to give the Afghan people the information they need to make theright choices so they can use their own voices. It’s through with words, pictures and sounds that will tear down thegraft and corruption and provide transparency in the government, making it agovernment that works ‘for the people’. Those goals are shared with nearly every man or woman on the planet whostruggles for basic freedoms. Theirobjective is no different than the aim of our own media, and these Afghans arewilling to risk their lives to tell the story. It was easy to see that coming back to support, even in my own smallway, their fight for freedom and democracy was work worth doing. More importantly, the friendships have beenpriceless and a big reason I came back.

Reviewing Good Omens

2011-10-25T21:22:00.001+04:30

Good Omens by Terry Pratchett
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

This was my book of the year for 2010 and a fantastic gift from my wife. I read it while on deployment in Afghanistan so the humour worked wonders for my morale. One of the wittiest fiction reads I've had in a while; fast-paced and impossible to put down and here's why---

Never in a million years did I imagine being able to laugh at the the apocalypse but Terry Pratchett had me in stitches with this story of the end of the world. The banter between your average demon and your run of the mill angel carries much of the story as they work together to stop Armageddon, not so much for our sake as their own selfish reasons.

It's an English-version modern-day Don Knotts and Tim Conway battling to save the world from Doomsday against the hordes from heaven and hell. Why? Well for no other reason than to keep themselves employed with a purpose they've enjoyed for centuries.

There are a multitude of supporting characters including a nice little boy who has to come to grips with the fact that he is the Antichrist, as well as witches and witch hunters, demons and faeries. It's a great story that will build to a fantastic crescendo as our world hangs in the balance.

Who will win this story of good siding with evil to stop good and evil? You have to read it yourself and find out.

This is my book of 2010! Thank you Terry for writing this and thank you my lovely Rinni for sending it to me in the care package.

View all my reviews

Taking back your vote - one ad at a time

2011-10-25T15:41:00.000+04:30

Could a new trend in politics be emerging? Could candidates actually be looking to reducethe billions they spend each cycle?

Photo by Denver Post

Read a great article in the USA Today by Martha Moore that addressed thesequestions as she reported the significant lag in ad buys by GOP campaigns duringthe primary season, instead opting to take advantage of free air time throughthe increased number of televised debates. Makes sense to me since most of the country has been forced to cut theextras in their budgets and in many homes, even cutting essentials.

Hold on!

Before you put any of these politicians on the “goodwill” or“fiscally responsible” pedestal, wait and see. There is clearly strategy involved by not spending money now, that willbe needed later for the eventual nominee. Suffice it to say that when the money dam breaks, there will be a floodof cash pouring in to TV stations across the country and even more pouring intothose campaign war-chests from special interest groups and super PACs. Just know that as it happens, a little piece of your voice is being washed away in that tidal storm.

Best you read the article to draw your own conclusionshowever, consider the points the report brings up could reshape the politicaldynamic.

Imagine a campaign season where you saw speeches from town hallsand city centers, debates from across the country, and pundits arguing thepoints for and against each candidate. Imagine even more interaction between politicians vying for a top posthaving to spend even more time meeting future constituents, hearing theirconcerns and offering ideas. Now imaginenot hearing hate-filled fiction run on every television and radio stationacross the country. Imagine specialinterest groups and political action committees actually ceding influence topeople like you and I.

That world could exist with an approach that leverages newsand community events over advertisement and expensive gimmicks. It takes out the need for billions to run apresidential campaign, which is generally spent on TV ads. In turn that reduces the candidatesdependency on campaign financing from interest groups that have no interest inthe American people. Our politicalsystem takes one step closer to being a nation that lives up to “We the People”instead of “We the Wealthy Machine”. Andhow about that, electing an official based on who they are rather than how muchthey could raise in campaign money.

I think Senator McCain is and has been right to ask forcampaign finance reform but I think most of his ideas fall short on the massiveoverhaul that is needed. If you take themarketing and advertising out of the equation, along with the expense, what youare left with is something more objective, truthful and relevant. People would have to do a little morehomework rather than deciding on a candidate based on a 30 second advertisement.

So in a time where everyone of the regular folks istightening their meager budgets, so too should those who brought us theeconomic mess to begin with. It’s a timewhere we cannot afford not to look closely at these candidates. We saw two years ago that voters feltWashington needed reform but I say it needs to start at the beginning of theelection cycle.

I’m personally waiting for all of these top tier candidatesand elected officials to realize and care that our nation is hurting. I’m waiting for the one who steps away fromthe pack of professional politicians and stands with “We the People”.

So draw your own conclusions and read the article here: From USA Today

As always, your comments and ideas are welcome here.

DVIDS - Video - 2011 Mission Afghanistan Games

2011-10-24T18:38:00.000+04:30

Video story of US Forces competing in the 2011 US Forces CrossFit competition at the US Embassy in Kabul, Afghanistan.

Produced by Air Force Staff Sgt. Mary Dever.

DVIDS - Video - 2011 Mission Afghanistan Games

My Top Five Vacation Spots

2011-10-24T14:04:00.001+04:30

I have to say from the outset that I didn’t consider Alaskafor this list for no other reason than our nation’s largest state is reallyhome to me. I would certainly recommendit to anyone with the opportunity to go but please, don’t do the cruise and thinkyou’ve experienced what the state has to offer. No, the list before you covers a few of the places I’ve visited andfound remarkable for a plethora of reasons unique to each. I’m not a travel agent but I’d be happy togive you a point in the right direction if any of them strike your curiosity.

Photo by Tom) - near Hall of Mosses

5. Olympic NationalPark – This was the last trip Rinni and I took before this current deploymentpulled me back to Afghanistan and it was completely her idea but it wasperfect. The park itself features plentyof trees, streams, trails and loads of fresh Pacific West air. The ‘Hall of Mosses’ was incredible to seebut so was the drive in to the park. Infact, the entire peninsula on the most northwestern tip of Washington stateoffers something for just about everyone. On the way to the park you’ll encounter Forks, the town made famousafter the Twilight movies hit the big screen. You’ll also have a chance to take a side road to La Push, which was alsofeatured in the films and is actually part of the reservation. The people in the small towns all around thearea are who you would expect to encounter, friendly and more than willing totake the time to help an outsider find the best suited places andactivities. For me it was the fresh airin the rural outdoors with my wife that gave me such a relaxing feeling ofpeace.

Photo by Tom - Sunset Beach

4. Hawaii – It wouldhave easily been higher on the list but I have to tell you, save up before yougo. As expensive as it is Hawaii is aplace you should definitely see at some point in your traveling life. I’ve always been an ocean-guy. The sound of waves on a beach has animmediate calming effect, so with miles and miles of beaches, Hawaii was agreat place for an extended vacation. It’s more than beaches though, Oahu has plenty of hiking, off-roading,and a ton of Pacific-Islander culture to explore. You can take a slow walk through Haleiwa andexperience small-town island charm or take a drive down to Honolulu and bethrust into a thriving night life. I wasable to experience some of both but my favorite activity was snorkeling atSharks Cove and Hanauma Bay. True, thereare parts of the island where only locals are welcome but if you come to theisland ready to relax, you’ll have a great time.

Photo by Tom - Look kids, Big Ben

3. London – This hasto be my single favorite city and a spot I hope to see again and again. Big Ben and Parliament be damned, get intoGreenwich for a great open air market and a walk up the hill to see the actualinternational dateline. If you need tosate your inner-hippy then try starting at Trafalgar Square and work your wayto the art and theater district. Thething about London is that getting around the city is a snap if you’re notafraid to ride the tube. I’ve not seenso many museums that were so accessible anywhere else on earth. D.C. is close but London has it beat by a fewcenturies. The nightlife is great andthere really is something for everyone from the penny-pincher to thehigh-roller. The folks in most part ofthe city are great and if you like a pint with your meal you’ll easily get whatyou’re looking for in Kensington, Earls Court, or Piccadilly. Best city on the planet!

Photo by Tom - The Alpspitz

2. Garmisch-Partenkirchen– The alps have everything to do with why this little spot in the very south ofBavaria is nearly my favorite rest and relaxation destination. The language can be difficult even if youspeak German simply because the dialect is very different but it won’t impedeyou from having a good time. You’ll findgreat skiing in the winter and some great hiking in the summers, but year roundthe views are like nothing you’ll ever see anywhere else. While you can obviously find plenty ofdelicious German restaurants in the area, they also feature other cuisine toinclude Italian and Greek. Try them alland honestly, even after a multitude of trips there over the years I canhonestly say I never had a meal I didn’t love. The accommodations run the gambit from your hostel to the resort but ifyou’re looking to really enjoy the quiet nights taking in the mountain air thenyou have to see Hans and Bergita at the Edelweiss Hotel. Just don’t mistake it for the American-runEdelweiss Lodge and Resort. Make sure toget out and see some of the other local attractions to include Neuschwansteincastle and Linderhoff palace. There isplenty to do and enjoy for singles and families.

Photo by Tom - Delphi

1. Greece – Varietyis the spice of life here, in both the terrain and people you willencounter. I’ve never travelled to anycountry where I felt more welcome than my trip to Greece two years ago. I enjoyed every part of that two-weekvacation, from the quite island life in Poros to the hustle and bustle inAthens. We based out of a rented villanear Poros for the first week and branched out to ancient sites within easydriving distance. You can catch one ofthe speedy hydra-ships and island hop for the day or weekend or just pick aspot on the beach and hang out. Being acheese loving guy I fell in love with Saganaki and the wine was pretty tastytoo. Athens is an amazing city with oneof the largest outdoor markets I’d ever seen, stretching for city block afterblock. You can miss the Acropolis and amodest bus ride will get you to Poseidon’s temple. I even made it a point to drive out and seethe ‘Hot Gates’ where Leonidas’ 300 Spartans made their stand. Though the landscape has changed a good dealit’s worth seeing if you have the time. Probablyone of the most spiritual places on earth is there in Delphi. The ruins go all the way up the side of themountain where you will be left absolutely speechless for the incredible viewsacross ancient columns into the valley below. There is definitely a unique and peaceful vibe in Delphi. Theabsolute charm across the entire peninsula in both landscape and people are whyGreece is my clear number one vacation spot.

Want a tip or to share your own experience at one of the locations on this list then by all means drop a comment. I also have loads of photos from most of the places listed.

Book Review Posted

2011-10-24T09:17:00.002+04:30

Men Without Women by Ernest Hemingway
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

This is a great collection by a true master observer of life in his era. While many view the the "Roaring 20s" as a good time for all, Hemingway introduces us to the real folk who struggle with real life. For most of the characters in these stories, it's about circumstances driving choices with a form of accountability at the end. In many cases however, we are simply given to react our environment and the people in our lives. Still, there are those blasted choices, even from long ago, that shape our present world.

This was a great read for an angry young man who needed to understand that life happens with or without our input and that accountability always comes whether now or much later. I'd recommend this for anyone who wants to explore real people from just after America's previous turn-of-the-century, or for anyone who feels they are at a crossroads. You won't find great answers to life's mysteries but you may find some tools to use when you take a moment to reflect on the choices made and the road you're walking.

View all my reviews

The 1%

2011-10-22T09:48:00.001+04:30

AP Photo

There's been a lot of hubub in the media with this Occupy Wall street movement, which appears to be a whole lot of folks upset over how taxes are dispersed through the federal government's multitude of entitlement programs. I'm on deployment so it's tough for me to say who these people really are but folks back home characterize them as the "entitled" who want to solidify their spot in line to continue siphoning money that our country doesn't have.

Like any radical movement that starts, there also begins a counter movement. I'm not sure what 53% signifies but they are viral and encompassing the normally silent majority who seem to be sick of those protesters with their hands out, wanting more, but contributing little to nothing. I can relate to a lot of these people in the 53%.

I've been around a while and often heard politicians describe the 1% as being the wealthiest, elitists in our country. Today I'd offer you a look at a 1% that is neither wealthy nor elitist, in fact I submit to you that these are folks who provide the security and freedom for an American to peaceably assemble and bitch about the handouts they're not getting. This 1% has no voice of its own, depending on good Americans to speak on their behalf. This 1% is a microcosm of ethnic, social, and economic backgrounds but what binds them is a willingness to sacrifice for freedoms you can't buy with a government check, they will pay our nation's debts in blood.

For 19 years and counting, I'm proud to be the 1%. Will you speak up?

Seriously, I'm awake now

2011-10-21T20:28:00.001+04:30

When did the puck drop? I must have been sleeping or something because the Tigers weredestroying the American League enroute to a pennant, the Wolverines were aboutto win the Rose Bowl and a Big Ten Championship, and the Lions were about towin the Superbowl.

It was a euphoric dream in part because of how things havegone the last couple of years for most of the teams I love. Then some Spartan was standing over my bunkslapping me awake (didn’t even get a flag) and it was all gone. To make matters worse I wake up to realize it’s a bye week forMichigan and the Tigers are done until April.

For homer fans October means replacing the summer wardrobewith wing-wheeled sweaters, hats and long-sleeved Ts. People are flocking to the Joe, NHL CenterIce, or a local pub to get their fan-fix of a winning sports program in action,but not this year.

With so much happening in Michigan sports this year it’s nosurprise the Wings are skating under the radar. October generally means the Lions are deciding whether they’ll draftfirst or second, the Tigers have been golfing for a month, and the Wolverinesare working to be bowl-eligible with four-a-day practices.

Red-Hot

After 10+ years Detroit fans love their wings and their wingsalways bring optimism, the promise of a long playoff run and sometimes even agreat jump in the Central division. Thisyear is no different but it only occurred to me this morning that the boys were back on the ice becauseI’d been so caught up in the amazing runs by the Lions, Tigers and Wolverines(Lions beat the Bears).

I’ve spent the better part of the day catching up on theWings only to discover they are 4-0 going into Columbus (oh, how I loathe thattown), Juri Hudler is busting his tail in practice, and for some reason theyonly have four games played a month into the season. It seems the NHL decided to adopt a collegehockey schedule for month one of the season, which adds to the below the radarbusiness.

Pure Detroit

Detroit News Photo

You have to love how the team has spent their down time inthe community changing oil, serving pizzas, and meeting fans where the fansspend their day to days. You have toappreciate the Wings players using it as an opportunity to cheer on the Lionsand Tigers in a sorely needed show of solidarity for Detroit. Postgame handshakes aside, all three of ourdowntown coaches are classy, passionate supporters of the community but to meit was Babcock’s crew that really brought it all together because they’ve beenthere consistently and didn’t blow off a chance to be part of the bigger Detroitteam.

That’s the beauty of the Wings; you’re always confident thewins will come along with a good spot in the playoffs and you know fromownership on down, the team is pure Detroit in how they reach out to the cityand fans. Puck drops at 7:00 p.m. EST,and since I’m in Afghanistan, I’ll be following the tweets and pleased thatyou’ll be enjoying the game.

Last thought

AP Photo

On a serious note, the Lions got a triple dose of bad newsthis week with Javid Best possibly being out for the season and the RonnieBrown deal falling through; all minimal in the greater context as the teamlearned running back Jerome Harrison has a brain tumor. As many sports writers have already pointedout, the trade that didn’t happen likely saved his life since the mandatoryphysical is when the tumor was discovered. A little more Detroit solidarity with all our prayers for a good man to beat a tough opponent.

Time to move on Michigan

2011-10-21T17:30:00.000+04:30

Detroit Free Press Photo

It’s almost time to move on from talking about suspensionsand personal fouls, and fortunately it seems the Wolverines have despite thepress. It’s been such a focus I wonder ifthe Schawrtz-Harbaugh handshake didn’t exacerbate the story line. At any rate Wolverine nation – our belovedteam got outplayed by a better team last Saturday, flags be damned. It just happened to be one of those teams BradyHoke circles on his big calendar. To put the exclamation point on it, Gholston did get a one-game suspension and of course it came from outside the program. Timeto move on for the last shot at redemption this season and to prove that Michigan is backto being Michigan.

On to Purdue?

To me this is a “who cares” game because there were reallyonly three on the schedule that should count; Notre Dame, Michigan State andoSU. With two of the three already in the books that leavesthe semi-pro club from Columbus, so why are we even talking about Purdue,Illinois, Nebraska or anyone who’s not sporting a new ride and a fresh tattoo?

Above - part of the salary & benefits package

I mentioned last week and I’ll say it again, these nextgames should be nothing more than tune-ups for the big one at the end and I’m noteven talking bowl games yet. TheWolverines are at home after the bye week with the 3-3 Boilermakers, followedby road games in Illinois and Iowa. Allthree are games they can win. Beating thenew kids in the Big Ten would be a major upset, but I could care less aboutthat game either…we’re talking about the ‘children of the corn’. Let's face it, there are plenty of seasons to come where we can learn to hate them, but we’ll never hate themas much as that other team wearing scarlet red.

I view the next four opponents as opportunities for a major tuneup before the one game that matters most. If the Wolverines focus on positioning the athletes, schemes and plays ina way that culminates on November 26^th then I am good with howeverthe cards fall with the teams they face up to that point. I’d be fine if at the end of the yearMichigan only has seven wins as long as number seven is won on Nov. 26.

I love the emphasis that Hoke put on a few of these keyrivalry games, getting back to the base of the Michigan tradition. With the loss to Sparty last Saturday histeam has a bitter taste in their mouth, after having run the table up to thatpoint. So why not go all in and focus onoSU? Anything else and you’re consignedto tasting a horrible filth for an entire summer if you lose to that franchise,even if you win ten games.

East Lansing Aftermath

2011-10-19T23:32:00.000+04:30

It’s been an interesting week as a Wolverine fan watchingthe media coverage in the wake of a disappointing loss last week in EastLansing. Despite being an ocean away inland-locked Afghanistan, I've been able to follow most everything thanks to theFreep and Detroit News online.

Best ofall, and this is a shout out, to the UMGoBlog on Twitter. Not only does the crew at UMGoBlog hook me upwith some food for thought throughout the week, but on game days I can follow along. Many thanks for standing up to the Spartanmedia handlers and keeping the tweets flowing last week.

Let’s begin with the ugly.

Detroit News Photo

It seemed like the fact that the Spartans dominated the lineof scrimmage on both sides of the ball, the story coming out so far this weekhas focused on personal fouls, dirty play and suspensions. Apparently ‘little brother’ took Brady Hoke’scomments about face punches a little too literally; at least it seems WilliamGholston did at any rate. Now you havethe Freep’s Michael Rosenberg calling on Dantonio to suspend the player while moronicMatt Millen saying it was nothing but, “Youthful Exuberance”.

Any given Sunday I’d put Rosenberg in charge of my team’sfront office before I’d even let Matt ‘Mayhem’ Millen fold the towels in thelocker room. At least I could have faiththat Rosenberg would actually draft a football player whereas Millen wouldprobably go for the ball-boy with a checkered past in the first round.

But I digress.

Suspension or not, that’s a decision the NCAA is going tohave to sort out and whatever the outcome I’m okay with it. Likewise with the other personalfouls/roughing the passer penalties that were called, the big boys get to lookat tape and figure it out. Here’s what Ican say for sure, Rosenberg wasted a great column because Coach Dantonio willnot suspend anyone. Gholston could haverobbed the concession stand at halftime, the whole thing on tape, and he’dnever bench him.

Think back to 2008-2009 and Glenn Winston. Had the coach acted decisively andimmediately, eight of his players would likely have not been involved in the2009 frat house beat down and subsequently suspended. Or how about the ESPN headline that went something like, 'Michigan State Spartans reinstate Glenn Winston following jail term'.

That’s not to say Gholston even approaches the level of dubiousnessbecause he’s done nothing Winston-like but you still have to wonder aboutDantonio’s stomach for discipline. JohnNiyo from the Detroit news hits on the same point about college coaches and anaversion to discipline. Shoot, sit the kid for a half, something that says the MSU program has class and will police itself.

There are some positives to take away from the plethora ofmedia commentary however, Hoke’s team and even the coach himself, didn’tbite. No, they are all taking the highroad. It’s clear to me the boys in Maizeand Blue are going to put this one in the bank for next season’s in-staterivalry game in Ann Arbor.

Rest in peaceSparty.

Five More Little Things

2011-10-18T15:42:00.000+04:30

It’s time to share with you the weekly list of some little things that make a difference on deployment. The last two weeks have focused on some of the positives you only get while deployed. This week I’m going back to a few of the things I’m really looking forward to having when I get back. While there is nothing more special than having your family with you, these are a few of the little things I certainly appreciate more now that I’m without them.

Absolutely numero uno on this list is the reason I’m excited about the drive to work each day. Yeah, the satellite radio helps but there is something that reinvigorates you when you step on the gas and feel that growl turn into a roar. Feeling the road and the wind helps me find a calmer place before I head home in the evening and it’s the morning wake-up without the coffee.

Speaking of…how about a real, almost gourmet cup of the good stuff? I take a tremendous amount of pride in delivering something like this for my Rinni. Yes, I like it black sometimes too but there is something special about a well-made cup made in my own home, especially after a big evening meal.

Yes, a big home-made meal is certainly something I savor. Not that the food is horrid here but nothing replaces the ingredients I pick out and put together on my own and let’s not forget Rinni’s handiwork with the Chicken Adobo. She likes the rice and I prefer noodles but either way it’s brilliant and sorely missed.

I also miss those solitary moments on the beach. Hell, I miss the water in general considering we’re land-locked and surrounded by angry people so a beach, any beach would be great. I think I’d even let the boys bury me again. Don't think being at the beach with the boys wouldn't be solitary? Once they bury you it's boring for them so they quickly run off, leaving you to some peace and quiet in the cooler sand.

It's the simple freedom of movement, the ability to drive, fly, walk, ride, hike to any spot I want on earth (for the most part) and explore to my heart’s content that means so much. I miss being able to really exercise my curiosity and explore places like Stockholm, London, the Olympic National Park, or any national park for that matter.

Clean air and big spaces, warm drinks and tasty food, a wild ride on a long road…I miss them all. It’s okay though, I don’t dwell other than the occasional solitary moment to appreciate and plan for the next time I can savor five more little things.

Why I Came Back: Reason 4

2011-10-17T17:12:00.001+04:30

When I think about what drove me to come back here there are several things that come to mind but number four is a driving force for coming back and for most everything I’ve been able to do over the last 19 years. Even when I’m in the zone, this single consideration is always at the fore of my mind.

Reason Number 4: The Team

The early years it was about the guy or gal next to me, my peers. We shared experiences that most young kids would only dream about. For crying out loud, I went to Normandy with a slew of paratroopers for the 50^th Anniversary of D-Day. I’d never seen so many vets in my life, guys who actually jumped on the cold June night. That trip showed me that the team was so much bigger and even with 50 years between us a Paratrooper is a Paratrooper. That was without a doubt one incredible experience, to see the drop zones, the beaches and speak with so many Medal of Honor recipients. I am still humbled.

That legacy and the history lesson I began at Fort Bragg in 1993 continues today. Most of those Soldiers from the early days have gone on to other things every so often I run into one. The first crossroad came while I was stationed in Germany. It seemed simple, my initial contract was coming up and I was sticking to the original plan, four years and out. The problem was I couldn’t let go because there was more to do, more to see, and more people to meet. I’d never had such incredible peers and leaders and I wanted an opportunity to pass on to others what had been given to me. I reenlisted, made sergeant and moved back to Fort Bragg to learn to lead from some of the best in our Army.

You make mistakes when you’re cutting your teeth but when you have Soldiers you can never stop trying. It’s those early guys; Vonsick, Pierce, West, Price, Morrison, and so many others who still drive me to learn. Each new assignment brings a new crew and new challenges. In Iraq I learned so much about how important a role player is on a team and that sometimes the best way to lead is to follow. Rhodes, Donnolly, Rainsford, Nihill and Marshall were the folks I could always count on to keep me going and make me try harder because every piece of the puzzle counts and you don’t want to show up without your piece. Last year it was Counts, McCabe, Bocanegra, Wilt, Bailey and Campbell…we even adopted a Bettencourt and a Sherman. They taught me how critical it is to give everyone a role and then to step back and let them perform, and they were awesome!

It’s a new team now with new faces and new roles. Every day we face challenges but I know I can count on each and every member of the team to do their part. It’s motivating and nowhere on this earth are you going to find this kind of culture. True, there are days that give you headaches and many where you miss your family like mad and you wonder what you’re doing half a world away, but the team keeps you going. The people you have a chance to influence for the better, to help through a rough spot, to share some tough times and good laughs are what draw you to and keep you in the fight and they are a big reason I chose to come back.

Rough day for this fan

2011-10-16T21:24:00.001+04:30

Detroit News Photo

I could have avoided the television and internet over the last 24 hours and went about my day in complete bliss. Last night was a big night for this fan, landlocked in Afghanistan and completely at the mercy of the American Forces Network for live/taped sports and ESPN.com and twitter for the latest scores and stats. Not a good statistical day for the two biggest games on my slate, Michigan – Michigan State football, and Game 6 of the American League Championship Series.

We’ll start with a positive.

The Tigers lost and some may say lost big and you could expect that after the Rangers put up 15 runs. I don’t buy it as a big loss, disappointed for sure but what a heck of a team.

Detroit News Photo

You have to look at the body of work, regular season and the playoffs. Do that and you can see why Jim Leyland said before game six that he couldn’t be prouder of any team he’s managed.

This is one of the scrappiest teams I’ve seen since Jack Morris was king of that hill off Michigan and Trumble. Sure, a similar group of Tigers made it to the World Series in 2006 and they also had a bit of a chip on their shoulder but I think the team was even surprised to be there to a certain extent. They were certainly underdogs after backing into the playoffs and many outside Detroit probably felt their pummeling of the Yankees was a fluke.

The 2011 Tigers shouldn’t have surprised anyone, particularly after the second half they played, dominating everyone in the Central Division. Going into the best-of-five with the Yankees the Tigers were expected to give the Bronx Bombers all they could handle and they out gritted them throughout. Even against the Rangers, MVP candidate and Tiger Ace, Justin Verlander showed the kind of moxie and grit in game five of the ALCS that we haven’t seen from a Tiger ace in nearly a generation.

Leyland was proud? Shoot, this Tigers team gave the all of Michigan hopeful and bright, something to be proud of as everything outside of sports seems to be so terribly bleak. What really sticks with me too is that the team seemed to understand the situation at home and played even harder. You certainly got that sense from Jim Leyland after they clinched their playoff spot. His post game comments were interrupted by the pure emotion of the moment, his pride in his players and his city and state.

So it didn’t end after six games. What the Tigers gave Detroit will last well into the winter, and while deficits continue to pace the bickering in Lansing and D.C., at least people will have something good to reflect on and look forward to as the boys tune up for what should be another solid run as a contender in 2012.

I was a whole lot less impressed with the Michigan Wolverine football team I saw last Saturday. To be fair I’m not even so much disappointed in them as I am the whole flakey fan-base across the country who actually thought they were a number 11-12 ranked team. No way, and no way they should have been ranked in front of ‘Little Brother’.

Detroit News Photo

While I’m fired up about the fantastic job the coaching staff is doing and the attitude these kids have, I’m not so intoxicated with the Maize and Blue elixir that I figured them to be a Big Ten champion this season. Should that be the goal? Absolutely and Brady Hoke has the right of it because these kids have the ability to become a championship-caliber team but not this year, not now. Coach has to put that mark on the wall, along with the dates of the game in Lansing and that little town Ohio southeast of Ann Arbor.

I wrote a few days ago that this game against the Spartans would be Michigan’s biggest test so far and after the game it really is a good gauge and where the team is on this road to recovery. The offense was ‘exposed’ as the ever pessimistic Drew Sharp put it in his Sunday column. I’ve been saying since week three that I felt Denard Robinson was one dimensional, that he needed to be able to throw better and the team needed its other backs to step up. After watching the replay of yesterday’s game I stand by my thoughts on the quarterback but I certainly don’t put it all on his shoulders because there were some obvious experience issues on the field.

The Spartan defense bunched the middle of the line, filled the gaps and blitzed the edges, leaving Denard nowhere to run. Obviously you’d expect the quarterback to hit a back on a screen, a receiver running a hot route, someone trying to become a target short yardage. Didn’t happen. It was more obvious after watching the second time that there is a huge need to upgrade the wide receiver position with some bigger targets and guys who can recognize a corner blitz. That’s when the cornerback starts running in the opposite direction of your route when the ball is snapped and it’s generally an idea to find an open patch of grass very quickly.

One thing I’m still trying to figure out is whether the Spartan defensive line just overpowered the Wolverine offensive line or if Urban Meyer sold tickets to the Michigan backfield as part of his play-by-play promotional gig. MSU owned the line of scrimmage for most of the game and Michigan couldn’t answer. They couldn’t get their backs going and Robinson couldn’t hit his targets consistently.

The Wolverine defense was solid. True, the team lost and they gave up a lot of yards on the ground but they created turnovers, giving the ball back to their offense. That defensive unit would bend a little but for the most part they held up well on their end of the field. Think back to the years around the Wolverine national championship season and you’d see a similar defense, bend but don’t break.

So the Big Ten Championship isn’t likely this year but you have to like the direction this program is going under the new coaching staff. You have to be optimistic with the quality of recruits coming in over the next couple of years and I think it takes that long to really contend for a championship. More importantly, the Wolverines should come to grips with these points and focus on the one goal that will really make this season matter, beating that Pro-College team in Ohio.

I think the coaching staff takes away some valuable lessons from East Lansing but what they do with those lessons is key. You have to forget about Wisconsin and every other team you play before that last regular season game. Every Saturday between now and then, to include the practices along the way, should be designed to tool this team to crush oSU.

They’re already bowl-eligible, so every game but the last is irrelevant. National rankings be damned, put an end to this ridiculous losing streak against your rival and this season can truly the mark on the wall where Michigan turned it around and got back to being Michigan. That is something those seniors can be proud of and it can be the cornerstone in rebuilding college football’s winning-est program.

A rough day for this fan in Afghanistan but the promise of better sports days ahead with the Wings getting started and it should be a good one tonight with the 5-0 Lions taking on the 4-1 49ers. I’m just hoping for better results.

A case for Verlander

2011-10-15T00:11:00.002+04:30

Photo By: Julian H. Gonzolez (Detroit Free Press)

You can talk stats until you’re blue in the face and let’s be honest, a CPA could make a case for more than a dozen guys in each league where it concerns the statistical duel for Most Valuable Player. It’s really simple, Justin Verlander is the 2011 American League Most Valuable Player.

While stats indicate likely impact, likely doesn’t always track with reality. Forget that Verlander won the A.L. pitching Triple Crown and forget that he’s the hands down Cy Young winner as well because cumulative hardware doesn’t make an MVP any more than all of the statistics do. Let’s face it, if the Tigers had another second-half meltdown and don’t win the division and make the playoffs we’re not even having this conversation because even though he would still be the statistical best pitcher and probably one of the league’s best players but his impact didn’t make the difference.

News Flash: Verlander’s Tigers did make the playoffs and he is very much part of the MVP conversation and really the only guy you can vote for because beyond the incredible stats, his ridiculous ability to through a 100 MPH fastball in the eighth, this Verlander guy impacted the entire American League. Teams shuffled bullpens and batting orders days in advance because he was projected to pitch against them.

There is the argument that every day players have more impact and while there are plenty of guys with bats and glove who do have a big impact in the league, none have been as consistently dominating or created the impact as Justin Verlander in 2011. No, Verlander doesn't get you an RBI, a home run, or even a single. He just prevents the other team from scoring any runs. He shuts them down, forces the ground ball outs, broken bat dribblers that turn to double plays, and causes the best hitters in this game to freeze in the box. You can also say he doesn’t win without the defense or the hitting, and the Tigers hit well this year. I would only add that in many cases, to include the sixth inning of the ALCS game 5, Verlander’s ability to dig down and dominate opposing teams sparked the Tiger bats.

His similar performances throughout the season not only sparked bats but motivated the rest of the pitching staff, starters and relievers, and that is what an MVP does. Accountants will agree that his individual stats clearly mark him as the best pitcher in 2011. Fans, players and coaches only need to feel that tension in their gut to know it’s Justin Verlander’s attitude, grit and dominance that generates the effect he’s had in the home and visitors clubhouses. Those are marks of a game changer and the American League’s Most Valuable Player.

Hype? Wolverines have their first test

2011-10-13T22:39:00.001+04:30

It has to say something when the AP and a whole bunch of college football coaches rank your program number 11 or 12 in the country but I haven’t bought into all the hub-a-baloo. The Wolverines looked solid against lesser teams with a much improved defense and a sometimes dynamic offense that brought them back against Notre Dame and completely overpowered Minnesota. Still, an objective viewer could see the chinks in the armor.

This weekend marks the first time in the 2011 season the Maize and Blue could be tested through four quarters. I say could because even though the Michigan State Spartans have a more balanced offense and a more experienced defense, the little brother from Lansing has the ability to choke at the crucial moment and then completely implode. We haven’t seen it in the last couple of seasons and I don’t expect it Saturday simply because they’ve bled the Wolverines to the point where they’ve lost their fear in much the same way Michigan lost its swagger under the RichRod regime.

Hoke and his coaches are going to have to bring their A-game plan to East Lansing if they want to continue this unbeaten streak but more than snazzy plays and offensive schemes. It’s going to take an old-school Big Ten black and blue beat down to secure the win this week, meaning U of M needs to be able to run the ball consistently with their backs and work the play action pass / option. While the blitz schemes have been effective, the defense needs to swarm on the ball and tackle well.

Smash-mouth football will give the Spartans pause after a couple of quarters of having the ball run down their throats for no other reason than the Michigan they have played has looked more like ballerinas than boxers the last couple of times out. The Wolverines need to “punch them in the mouth” as Hoke said earlier in the week.

Can they? It depends on the fundamentals. Look back to the days when Woodson roamed the secondary and you’ll remember a defense that tackled well and didn’t give up big plays. That defense would bend but not break, eventually wearing the opponent down and then turning it up another notch to seal the game. The offense was much the same, not a lot of big plays but they were balanced and consistent.

The little brother has grown up, put a little weight on and isn’t shy about throwing it around. Look for a motivated Spartan team to come out swinging. If the Wolverines can contain them and turn this into a good old-fashioned Big Ten grind, they can come out with a win and prove a portion of the hype.

Michigan by 3

Five Additional Things

2011-10-12T20:59:00.003+04:30

Like every deployment I find the occasion to take a moment and reflect on the little things I miss and the little things I’m grateful for while far from home. Because they’re not big things you don’t dwell on any of them and they’re easy to overlook so thinking on them helps me exercise my curious side.

So this week I have five additional things I’m grateful to have here in Afghanistan:

1. A special kind of coffee: Normally I don’t support the branding but I have to give it up for Mike Lavigne and the Keurig machine in the office. Not once since I arrived have I wanted for a cup of coffee. Not once have I needed the caffeine goodness and walked in to find and empty pot because my father-in-law drained it to the dregs and left it that way. God bless you Keurig and Mike!

2. Mail: The only mail I get back home are bills or people wanting me to spend my money but here the mail I get makes me smile. I don’t get a lot but at least here I receive the occasional care package and letter or card from Rinni. There is nothing like those four magical words she always writes, “I love you mostesteringedshonausen”. She’s all mine!

3. Wardrobe: It’s really simple here because there are basically two choices of clothing to wear; the standard combat uniform and the physical training uniform. No decisions about shirts or ties or pants or shoes when it’s time to go to dinner…all you do is grab a couple of buddies and roll down to the dining facility in your combat-best and get your grub on.

4. Packing Heat: Everywhere you go you’re practicing your second amendment right to bare arms and not only is it a right, it’s a requirement. The only thing better than a 9 on my hip would be a .45ACP Springfield 1911 but I’ll stick with the Beretta for now.

5. No non-operational Driving Required: Everything is in walking distance. Whether it’s grabbing a meal, picking up mail, dropping off laundry, going to or from work, it’s all right here and within walking distance. Even better is the $4.00 a gallon I’m not paying to do all those things!

So a short little list of the five additional things I’m grateful to have. If you’re a current or former deployer feel free to comment. If you’ve never experienced a place like this then use your imagination and leave a comment. More things next week…don’t forget to sign up for e-mail delivery or become a follower on the right side and...you can use the little icons below to tell others to drop in to The Way Station. Cheers!

Why I Came Back – Reason 3

2011-10-11T09:07:00.005+04:30

A couple of weeks ago I decided to put fingers to keyboard and revisit the reasons that compelled me to volunteer for this third consecutive deployment. If nothing else it serves to help me see a larger view of why I am here. Each is enough to satisfy the question in my mind, why. The thing is, when you get so ‘in the zone’ with the pace of the work here your reasons for doing it get lost and I think it’s important, for me at least, to take a step back and remember.

There are several, but for now let’s focus on Reason 3:

PFC Richard James Beebe

One of those things with family that binds us is legacy. I couldn’t tell you whether or not my family had any ‘war heroes’ in it or not but there were plenty of heroes in my mind at least. There was my grandfather, Lloyd Clementson, who served in the Army Air Corps during World War II. My uncle Earnest Clementson was stationed on Oahu during the Japanese bombing of Pearl Harbor. Later his brother Howard would join the fight in Europe. One the other side of the family my great-uncle Bill was in the pacific theater and survived both Burma and Guadalcanal but was so stricken by the experience he didn’t touch a firearm until many years later, when he went hunting with his son only weeks before he died. My grandfather, Richard Beebe served in Korea in an anti-aircraft artillery battalion. One of his brothers, being a little on the small side, was a belly or nose gunner in a flying fortress during WWII.

There were many more and though none talked about their wars and though there were many I never met, including my grandfathers, I always marveled at what sort of adventures they must have had. These were my first heroes and as early as four or five years old, I wanted to follow in their footsteps. Tragically, even to this day I know so little of their stories because as a child I didn’t know how to frame the questions. As the years have passed I have many that will likely go unanswered. But I do take solace in knowing that despite the differences in everything from equipment to the nature of our enemies, I’ve had the chance to walk a similar path. They all answered the call to fight, Japanese, Germans, Italians, and North Koreans.

So I’ll follow this path a little longer, at least until this fight is done and I'll ask you to stop by again next week for reason number 4.

Pumpkin Patch at Picha Farm

2011-10-10T05:54:00.002+04:30

Rinni here, sharing some pumpkin patch pics and fun!

Rows and rows of lovely pumpkins!

A fantastic corn maze to get lost in!

Why must you always take pictures of me, mom?

Tyler, giving that sling shot everything he's got.

Tyler, helping Ryan pull that super shooter.

My little pumpkin.

Wheelbarrow rides are awesome!

Especially when the sky is somewhat blue. This is a GORGEOUS October day here in Washington state. ;)

Piles of pumpkins were waiting for pick up out in the patch.

Tyler found the perfect pumpkin to lounge on.

This is what too many carmel apples can do to you! ;)

Happy Harvest everyone!

30 Days in Afghanistan: Part Two -- On the hunt for IEDs

2011-10-09T11:37:00.000+04:30

Reporter Jeff Van Sant shares his month with I Corps Soldiers in Part two of this five part series:
30 Days in Afghanistan: Part Two -- On the hunt for IEDs

30 Days in Afghanistan: Part One 'The box of death'

2011-10-08T14:27:00.000+04:30

A great piece of work below by one of our embedded reporters, Jeff Van Sant from Q13 in Seattle-Tacoma. Jeff spent a month with the I Corps out of Joint Base Lewis McChord, Washington on his very first embed in Afghanistan. Very impressive work for an 'old school' story telling journalist. Give it a look and follow is series: 30 Days in Afghanistan.

30 Days in Afghanistan: Part One 'The box of death'

Qubel Bay High School Renovation

2011-10-07T17:36:00.002+04:30

The link below will take you to a story near and dear to me and many at the NATO base here in Kabul, Afghanistan - and it certainly ties into my post last week: Why I Came Back - Reason 2. At any rate, this story was produced by our newest team member, Air Force Staff Sgt. Mary Dever, and we're very proud she took the time to cover something you'll rarely see in the commercial media. Check it out and help spread the good work our troops are doing with their very limited free time

DVIDS - Video - Qubel Bay High School Renovation

Five Other Things

2011-10-06T14:50:00.002+04:30

A little over a week ago I posted a list of the five little things I missed being away from home. While there is no replacement for time with my wife and boys, the time off on the weekends, or the freedom of movement without fear of being blown up, there are some small benefits you learn to leverage on a deployment.

This week it’s the glass-half-full; five other things that are good you only have while being deployed.

1. Laundry: Bottom line is that someone else does it and I have a bag of clean stuff in about 24-hours. While Bagram has ‘Green Beans’ and Kandahar has a boardwalk, I get clean clothes and nearly on demand.

2. Foreign Military: It’s great to be in such a big melting pot and in theater is one of the few places we get to spend a lot of time with our allied partners. You learn a lot being around them and while sometimes the differences can be a little frustrating, the collegial atmosphere can bring it all together and you’ll leave with a net-gain having completed the exchange over the months. I particularly love working with the British officers and senior NCOs.

3. European-Style Grub: I’ll be honest, the dining facilities on American Camps are way ahead of what we have here but I’ve learned to embrace some of the Euro-style treats available to us like cold-cuts, cheese and fresh bread. Throw in some yogurt and dry cereal along with bangers and mash and I’m a happy camper. Could be MREs all day so I’m happy to have my Euro-grub!

4. Organized Chaos: Our team deals with a lot of crisis management over here and it can get pretty frantic sometimes but while immersed, you have the chance to really focus. I’m not worried about balancing a social calendar, real work, dumb work, tons of other people’s good ideas, etc. Here it’s just three things…crisis work, preparing for crisis work and sleeping.

5. Team Mates: Because you’re all in it together and you have only an indirect tie to that family support network you really learn to rely on your team mates to deal with the day to day grind, personal frustrations, and all the other problem sets associated with work and being away from home. A team is never closer than while deployed because you live, work, eat and sleep in the same places. While you miss your privacy and especially your family, having a solid team inspires and gets you through the 12-15 months of shared difficulty.

My five other things: good things worth taking the time to appreciate. I think we work to find the best in a tough environment even if the initial shock is more negative than positive. You have to do that just to cope. So those are a few of the ‘other things’ that really only exist here to help me get through my days.

Why I Came Back - Reason 2

2011-10-04T11:15:00.007+04:30

In an effort to reflect on this second consecutive trip to Afghanistan and remind myself that what we're doing matters, I'm posting the reasons here. Agree or don't, that's not the point because we can all banter on about the politics, the winning and losing, the cost, the sacrifice and whether or not it's been worth it. A year ago it was simple, a discussion with my wife and a lot of soul searching and we decided I needed to be back. Beyond all the motivations then I am weekly finding and experiencing things that reinforce my resolve.

Reason number 2 ( a pair):

A hopeful pair

Every so often I get to travel outside the compound and visit a few of the area schools that do their best to give underprivileged children an education. For weeks we've been collecting school supplies from generous donors so they have the bare essentials for learning.

This pair to the left represent hundreds of children I've seen who want nothing more than an opportunity at a better life and they know that an education will be what makes the difference. Empowering them with these tools will make the biggest, most lasting difference in Afghanistan. So for them, coming back was something worth doing.

Reason number two, a pair symbolizing so many. Drop in again next week for another reflection and as always, your thoughts and comments are welcome.

Hey Michigan, One Game At A Time

2011-10-01T21:13:00.002+04:30

I have to start by disclosing that I love the University of Michigan football program, particularly now with the coaching changes. Now, on to the college football thoughts for the week.

I really admire Coach Brady Hoke and the crew he’s brought in because they seem like role models with integrity; good men who can give our kids the kind of tough love they need to be successful on the field and in life. I feel like this is a group of coaches who will certainly improve the program’s wins and losses from last year but mostly I’m pleased with these guys because they represent the school so well, both in how they carry themselves today and their respect for the team’s history.

I should also point out that as much as I love the Wolverines, I loathe Notre Dame and I absolutely detest that tattoo art school in Columbus, Ohio. No, it has nothing to do with the salary cap the Columbus program uses to compensate players and really there isn’t enough time to list all the reasons. With the ‘Irish’ it really has more to do with another storied program that burned us a few times in the last couple of decades. I like MSU on any day except the seven that make up ‘Rivalry Week’. But enough of that.

I have to protest the BCS/AP/USA Today rankings today because they have the Wolverines in the wrong spot. That’s right, Michigan should be ranked below both our little brothers from Lansing and that autograph-marketing school in Columbus. Hold on and take a breath! If you’ve watched any of the games these last four weeks there are some things that are abundantly clear and certainly point to the Wolverines being ranked but also point to them being ranked a bit too high.

You have to love the improvement in the defense. A lot of experience came back to the secondary and at the point of attack. That line has done a great job pursuing the quarterbacks and the rest of the D has been creating turnovers and not giving up huge plays. They’re way better than they were last year both from a scheme and a teamwork standpoint. No huge upgrades in talent but they are playing better together and that has a lot to do with coaches and reinstituting tradition.

The offense is one-one-dimensional. Yes one-one because there is one player who excels in one facet of the game. That one-one dynamic is Denard running the ball but keep in mind, he’s not run against MSU or the sweater-vest manufacturing school in Columbus. They’ve played second tier schools with one exception; Notre Dame. Notre Dame dominated almost the entire game against Michigan with the exception of the fourth quarter. You could say that a comeback like that is indicative of a great team but I attribute the Irish meltdown to some timely motivation and some sort of weird space-time continuum muck the Irish couldn’t overcome.

SDSU fans need to get over themselves right here because, I got it, you have a pretty solid offense, but they didn’t show up. Your quarterback and receivers were way off and that killed your run game. Played like a MAC team rather than a PAC 10 team.

You have to credit Hoke’s boys for coming prepared and putting a good score up though it seemed like there were lots of missed opportunities. And that’s precisely my point with the offense. Robinson is not throwing like a solid Big Ten starter, let alone an elite passer. He runs through, around and over most people and has been the offense for Michigan while the coaches sort out where the other rushing is supposed to come from. I think there’s promise but they are there now.

So what are the Wolverines going to do when they face a top-notch Big Ten defense and Robinson has nowhere to run? That’s the question I haven’t seen an answer for yet this season and I can’t be caught up in passing-receiving stats with the teams they’ve played so far because those are not high caliber defenses they’ve lined up against.

Number 19? You have to be kidding me. No sane person can tell me they could beat either of our rival schools this Saturday based on what we’ve seen so far but I do think they have a chance as we go along.

I’m a believer in these coaches and you can see several aspects of the game improve, to include the running game outside of Robinson. I think they will continue to get better and I also think Robinson’s passing game will improve over the course of the year. The defense will continue to grow and eventually we’ll hit a couple of field goals but here’s why they have a chance to win the big games in November; they truly have focus.

There is no question Brady Hoke wants a Big Ten Championship, as you’ll see in today’s Detroit Free Press, and the way he has that locker room running tells me they are all on the same page. I have no doubt Michigan has the ability to beat the Gophers today but what I’ll be looking for is can Denard improve in the passing game, can Smith dominate from the backfield, can the secondary shut down the passing game to allow Martin and company some time to crush the QB, and can we please make a field goal.

Where Michigan will get in trouble is if they get stalled moving the ball because Robinson is the only option, causing the offense to go four-and-out. You do that repeatedly and your defense will be gassed and open for the big plays late in the game.

I also think Michigan has a bit of a chip on their shoulder and something to prove to a coaching staff they love and respect. I think their reconnection to traditions is a source of motivation that can manifest in the fourth quarter of a tight game. You take those and couple them with some technical improvement and you have a shot at winning big games in November.

The problem is today is only October 1^st and they have a ways to go to truly get to 19 or any other spot in front of their rivals. I love this team’s potential but let’s take it slow and one game at a time and a good place to start is whipping Minnesota and keeping the Little Brown Jug in Ann Arbor.

Why I Came Back - Reason 1

2011-09-27T23:14:00.002+04:30

Maybe what I need to do is revisit this question from time to time because when I take a minute to think about why I cam back to Afghanistan I seem to come up with solid reasons. It's just when you're caught up in the grind that you sometimes forget but it's important to remember, particularly when you volunteer for the assignment. So starting today and as this tour winds along we'll look at all of the reasons.

Reason number 1 (actually three in one):

Rinni with Mischief and Mayhem

I'd do anything to keep them safe, even take on another year-long deployment. More than that is to put an end to this mess so none of my boys have to ever come back here to finish the job.

This time around though I count myself fortunate because I can talk to them often and the emails certainly help keep us all connected.

With some luck we'll maintain the momentum and find a conclusion that allows the boys to grow up without conflict and focus on things like college and seeing the world with a backpack and a rail pass instead of a rucksack and deployment orders.

Yes, reason number one and the driving force behind most of my thinking. Would ask that you drop back in sometime next week for another installment.

As always, your comments are welcome.

Five Little Things

2011-09-25T18:10:00.001+04:30

I’ve had the privilege of serving my country on what is now my third consecutive deployment overseas; this time Afghanistan. It truly is a privilege but with obvious sacrifices.

Leading up to one of these missions you tend to be so busy getting ready and making sure your family is ready that you don’t really appreciate all the small things you’ll give up. Even once you’re here it takes a while before it really sinks in because you’re going 100mph just trying to get integrated and into a routine.

I can tell you that more than anything I miss my beautiful wife and the kids, who’ve been on my mind since the orders for this mission came down. Now I’m at that point in this deployment where things have settled enough that you can take a few minutes to appreciate the little things that escape your attention when you’re caught up with the ‘getting here’ process.

1.  The neighborhood coffee stand – it’s on the way to everywhere I go, whether work or on errands and each time I stop by I’m greeted with a smile and a new blend of fantastic coffee. As a stop-gap some great folks from around the U.S. have been sending in flavored dry creamer in by the box-load but there’s nothing like a quick trip up to the corner to pick up two coffees to go.

2.  Satellite Television – Could be just that it’s fall but this is getting into peak sports season with the Tigers baseball making the playoffs, the Michigan football program is turning things around, lots of optimism with the Detroit Lions and plenty of hope for Red Wings hockey as they begin their season shortly. While AFN provides some programming here, there aren’t anywhere near the choices available and no way to DVR the games I would want to watch. Don’t even get me started about being 9 hours ahead of the rest of you.

3. Home Depot / Lowes – nothing I like more than do-it-yourself projects but at the moment a 2”x4” is a premium item here in ‘the Stan’. Of course even if I did have the lumber there is the issue with the correct tools; I have none. Another issue is if you forget something when you do put in a purchase request, it could be months before the subsequent order arrives. The part I miss most are the nice people in both stores; always ready to help me navigate the massive aisles. The money guy here is not a very nice bloke at all…the guy has a perma-scowl that rivals mine.

4. Room to relax – there are three of us in a room that is about 6’ x 15’. We’re crammed in with all of our gear and the few personal items we were allowed to bring. I know of prisons that offer better living conditions but you know, it’s okay. Still, I miss my massive master suite with huge bathroom and walk-in closet. I really miss the garage, where I tend to spend a good bit of time tinkering with projects and fixing bicycles for the twins. Both are places where I can get time to myself and relax.

5. My kitchen – weird hearing a dude say that? I’ll tell you what though, one of my favorite things to do on the weekend is pull some recipe out of cyberspace, hit the grocery store, and get to my own culinary laboratory. Most times it works out well enough to be edible but the process itself is always interesting.

So there are my five little things, the small stuff you don’t think about when you’re in the midst of going away on a deployment or extended trip. What might have been interesting though would have been to list the five small things before I left…food for thought and brings the obvious question; if you were to pack up and go away for work for the next year, what are the five little things you would miss most? And if you have deployed, what were your five?